


H.Quinn's Subs

by Chubbymonkeylee



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman: The Animated Series, Harley Quinn (Comics), Suicide Squad (2016), The Joker-Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Break Up Talk, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff, Getting Back Together, Happy Ending, Mild Language, Mild Smut, No abuse, Nonabusive Joker and Harley, Slice of Life, Two-sided, Violence, Weird Plot Shit, non-toxic, random idea
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:41:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 32,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27685730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chubbymonkeylee/pseuds/Chubbymonkeylee
Summary: Harley decides to open up a sandwich shop.
Relationships: Joker (DCU)/Harleen Quinzel, Pamela Isley & Harleen Quinzel
Comments: 14
Kudos: 16





	1. The Idea

**Author's Note:**

> This story idea was inspired by Papa's Cheeseria game.

“ All You Need is Subs” was located in the middle of the dark crime city of Gotham. The lovely sandwich restaurant owned by a lovely family was sadly running out of business. They couldn’t quite understand why, but maybe it had to do with the new Subway that opened up recently. The citizens of Gotham enjoyed eating there since the place had a nice atmosphere and the family made the customers feel special. Like they, too, were a part of their family. Lately, the number of customers has been decreasing as so the money. People want their food done in a matter of minutes and no longer made with precision and care. Sadly the family had decided to close down the place finally. This week was the last week that they were opened for business. 

***

Harley had just woken up from her short nap on her living room couch and was currently watching a movie. The past week more like the past month, had been tedious and dull. Nothing had been exciting or a hint of allure. Ever since she broke out of Arkham from blowing up a clothing store where the manager refused to give her a refund ( like it’s pretty dumb to not get a refund on a dress that you didn’t buy, she had nothing to do. The only thing she had done is binge watch shows on tv and had practiced her fighting moves. Harley needed to do something different, something new, something time-consuming.

After the movie ended, Harley laid back down and sighed. The girl laid there for a few seconds as she heard growling noises fill the room. She didn't move after the first growl but slowly rose as the fifth growl took place. Harley wore a simple red tank top and black sweatpants. She stretched her pale arms and legs as she lazily walked towards her refrigerator. The blonde opened the door and observed that her fridge only had a carton of chocolate milk, two pieces of ham, a cup of pudding, and a gallon of orange juice. Great, she had to go grocery shopping, she thought. The door of the fridge got slammed, but two seconds later got reopened again and closed once more.

" I guess, I'll go get somethin' tuh eat den." 

***

Nighttime was always filled with criminals ( Well, day and night, but more crimes happened at night). The streets were busy with cars and people roaming the night. Harley had put on a red jacket since it was fairly cold out. The girl chose to have a sandwich for the evening to diminish her hunger. Luckily, ‘All You Need is Subs’ was close to her apartment, so she didn’t need to travel that far. There were barely any customers as closing time was nearing. Harley stopped at the entrance to smell the toasted buttery bread. She licked her lips as she entered the establishment. Paul, the owner, an older gentleman, had been spacing off at the cash register until he heard the bell chime, meaning a new customer came in. He released a small smile as he saw with his brown eyes that it was Harley Quinn. By this time around, he and his family weren’t frightened by Harley’s appearance since she had been a regular. Sure, the first time, they were all scared to death when they saw the door open with The Clown Prince of Crime and his harlequin enter their restaurant. They all prayed to god that they were going to make it out alive that night. Nothing too extreme occurred as the clown couple just wanted to eat and weren’t aiming to kill anyone. Sure there were a few mishaps with the other customers, but they ended up alive only a few ambulances were needed. After that, the clowns made several appearances, so the family decided to be calm and make a truce with them. There were a few declines in customers ever since the clowns appeared ( maybe they were one of the reasons customers no longer paid a visit), but who could blame them. 

“ Hiya Pauly! “ Harley waved high as she skipped towards the counter. 

“ Well, hello, Miss Quinn. How’s your night going?” Paul seemed to notice that there would be less trouble if he made small talk. He did always seem interested in what she had to say. Paul didn’t know why but he felt more comfortable talking to Harley than Joker. There is still something about The Joker that makes him uneasy; bet he wasn’t the only one. 

“ Now Pauly, I’ve told yuh numerous times dat yuh can call me Harley. I mean, we’re family since dat is your motto. Right? Anyway, my night is fine, I guess.” The blonde sighed and pouted. 

“ Yeah, it’s the same for me. I mean, this is the last week we're open.” The older man frowned and looked down in sadness.

“ Last week?! What do yuh mean last week?!” Harley’s blue eyes widened as she was genuinely concerned. Like where else is she going to eat free sandwiches? 

“ Harley, My family, and I are running out of business. No one comes here anymore. I guess the people of Gotham prefer to go to Subway instead of here.” Paul heavily emphasized the name Subway with such disgust as if he smelled something bad in the air. 

Harley slammed her fists onto the counter.“ What dat’s...pure bullshit!” 

“ I know, we all know, but good things eventually come to an end. So do you want the usual?” Harley didn’t say one word but nodded instead. Paul wrote down her order, turned around to the kitchen, and yelled, “ I need one sandwich with texas toast, swiss cheese, sliced beef, bacon, and lettuce.” She then moved towards a table near an older couple and sat down with a disappointed face. They couldn’t close down; they just couldn’t. This place is special. She had a lot of good times by herself and when she was still with Joker. Harley pouted while she tapped her fingers on the table. Her eyes moved all around the place. Everything looked quite decent. The walls were a nice cream color with a chandelier in the middle of the roof, giving all the light in the area. The tile floor had different shades of blue, and all of the tables were black. The walls were decorated with paintings of landscapes or cityscapes. Then the counter with the kitchen in the back looked clean and neat. Harley thought it looked nicer than from the other places in Gotham, but there was one thing or maybe several different things that this place could look better. Maybe if the walls were painted a shade of red and maybe the paintings were clowns or something circus related. With the tables being white and having the salt and pepper shakers red and black. Now that would look nice! Harley smiled at the thought as she was still tapping on the black table. She sat there for a good while in silence until all of a sudden, she jumped out of her seat and jogged towards the counter.

“ Pauly, Pauly!” She yelled out as the other customers got startled at the sudden yelling of Harley Quinn. Paul came out of the kitchen with a curious expression on his wrinkled face.

“ What’s the matter? Did Uncle Tom come here again? I swear I told him that he should stop recording our customers for possible porn castings.” 

Harley had currently been jumping up and down in pure excitement. “What? No. Yuh with me? I just wanna know if yuh’re sellin' de place and how much would yuh want fawh it, or what?” Paul stood quiet for a moment as he was scratching his almost bald head. He had to answer quickly, or if he didn’t, Harley would have exploded as impatient as she is.

“ Well, yes, my family and I have decided to sell our place. It’ll break our hearts, but we have to. ( he paused for a moment, trying to calm himself down) But we still haven’t thought of a price to sell well, our second home. Why you ask?” he sniffed. 

“ I know dis might sound crazy. ( She laughed and moved her finger in circles) Well, I am crazy, but I just got an idea and wondered if yuh guys would considuh sellin’ de place tuh me.” She bit her bottom lip as she waited eagerly for a response. Paul slightly opened his mouth and widened his eyes a bit as he was shocked at her request.

" Really?! Are you sure about this?" Harley just smiled with her shiny white teeth showing.

" Yes! Okay? It ackshully could be fun! If yuh guys sell me your place, I'll open up my sandwich place. Right? And Maybe call it HarleyWay or Quinn Express, I doan know! Okay?" Paul took another minute of silence, but this time it took longer.

" Uhh. Umm. Let me discuss this with my family, and umm, come back tomorrow." Harley clapped her hands while her body shook in excitement. Every minute she imagined what fun adventures she could have. Every thought she had, she warmed to the idea even more.

" So here's your sandwich." He held a brown paper bag, and Harley immediately grasped the bag and started to leave.

"Thank yuh, Pauly! Okay? You're de best! Well, see yuh tomawhrow!" She waved back without having to look at the man. Before she entirely left the shop, she swiftly turned around and waved goodbye to everyone.

"Goodnight Everybody! I hope dat yuh all are alive fawh anudder day! Okay? If not, say hi tuh de devil fawh me alright! Bye!" Harley walked down the busy street as she unwrapped her mouth-watering sandwich.

***

Instead of going home, she decided to make a short visit to a dear friend of hers. Harley had finished her sandwich on the way to her friend's hideout. Once she got there, she had trouble opening up the gate due to all of the green vines surrounding it. Harley always had difficulties opening the entrance and would occasionally get cuts from some of the thorns. She eventually got the gate to open and ran inside the greenhouse area. Harley then cupped her hands ( with some new small cuts) together and placed them on her mouth to help project her voice.

" Red! Red! Red! Are yuh here, Red?!" She was about to call her again for the fifth time until she saw and heard the green vines' movement in front of her unravel to reveal a semi-exposed Ivy. Ivy had a dark green bra with dark green booty shorts to help contrast her light green skin. Her red hair was messy but not too much. It was just right.

" What brings you here, Harls?"

***

" So let me get this straight. You want to open up your sandwich shop, and you want me to help you?" Harley and Ivy were currently sitting in her " living room" to discuss Harley's plan. Ivy hadn't fully understood her friend's reasoning and logic to it. Harley noticed that Ivy had trouble warming up to the idea, which meant that she had a bit convincing to do.

"Yup! I wantcha tuh wawhk wit' me fawh dis fun project." Ivy raised an eyebrow and continued.

" Umm. Harley. Do you have any idea how even to run a business? Babe, you don't even have a permit to sell anything." 

"I doan need a permit. Right? Hell, do I even look like a person who follows de rules? I mean, when I was a doctawh, I did sleep wit' one of my patients fawh God sake. Yuh got me so fahr? I doan tink that's what doctawhs do." Harley laughed at the last part. But Ivy did have a point, though. She knew very little about owning a business, which meant she just had to wing it and hope for the best.

“ You’re right. But there is one thing, though...I don’t think I’ll feel comfortable cutting up vegetables or distributing them. That’s like if you chopped humans up and served them to others.” Harley moved her ruby lips back and forth, pondering to sell Ivy the idea. She hadn’t thought of that. She should have known better; of course, Ivy would have a problem with vegetables. Harley thought. The blonde pigtailed girl sat in silence, trying to figure out her little problem. 

Moments later, Harley’s eyes widened, and she instantly stood up. Ivy jumped a little at Harley’s sudden movements.

“I’ve got it! Okay? Yuh doan have tuh be around vegetables. So whenevuh customers orduh a sandwich wit' vegetables, let me take care of it. Den yuh can make de sandwiches dat don’t. See, I got your back, I've. Right?” Ivy looked at her friend with her green eyes. Harley couldn’t stand still with her body moving each second. Ivy then realized that she had no choice but to agree with her friend’s weird idea, but that’s what friends are for. Man, sometimes she missed the days before Harley entered her life. She didn’t care for anyone besides her plants, but she had to admit it was nice to have Harley around. 

“ Fine. I’ll join you.” She exhaled. Harley cheered by clapping her hands together and jumping up and down. Ivy giggled at Harley’s response as she shook her head. 

“Yay! I knew yuh’d do it. Well, yuh have tuh becawze yuh’re my friend. Right? Oh, Red, we’re gonna have so much fun!” Harley continued to giggle and started to skip around the green vine living room.

“ One question.” The blonde stopped in place and faced sitting Ivy. She didn’t speak a word but made a quizzical expression that Ivy took as a what.

“ How much is the place going to cost you?” She asked politely. 

“ Oh, Pauly hasn’t told me de price yet. Yuh got me so fahr? He said dat he’ll tell me tomawhrow. Okay? But tomawhrow mawhnin' I’ll go tuh de bank tuh get money just in case. Okay?” 

***

Six am in the morning had been too early for crime, Joker thought. Why didn’t he plan to do this last night or later at night? Anyway, Joker and a group of his henchpeople were at the back of a local bank in Gotham. All of them were heavily armed and ready to break in. Joker needed the money to plot his next scheme. He planned to donate money to a charity organized by Bruce Wayne anonymously. So when they receive it, the Joker toxin would take effect. Then everybody who would touch it would start laughing and gradually get louder and louder until it became deadly. Oh, imagine all the chaos and the look on their faces when they find out that the one who is responsible. Joker took in a long drag of smoke and let it roll out of his red lips.

" Alright, kids! Remember your positions and your instructions when we get in." Joker grinned as he dropped his cigarette and stomped it to the floor. " If any of you fuck up somehow, prepare yourselves for a private talk with your Uncle Joker." He released a low menacing laugh while he was loading up his gun bullets. The four henchpeople ( two guys and two girls) felt a slight shiver running down their backs, meaning that if they mess up, then their punishment would be death. Joker's right-hand man Frost who was the only normal-looking one out of the group( wearing a normal black suit with a white dress shirt and red tie), headed towards the back entrance first as Joker and the rest followed. After a couple of steps later, the guards had already encountered the clown and his small group. The two guards pulled out their guns but failed to use them as Joker quickly took care of them.

***

Harley had already managed to break into the bank by kicking down the front door. The normal way people expect criminals to break into empty places was using the back door. That's what this bank thought, which meant the guards were located in the back. She knew this, so she broke in the front. Once Harley was inside, she searched the place for some sort of map of the place. She ran and jumped on the counter and entered the forbidden area that only employees were allowed. Harley dropped her bat for a brief moment to find a map. Luckily she found it in no time in a nearby drawer. The girl smiled to herself in victory. Harley grabbed her bat and hopped off the counter, and went to an air vent that she could fit into.

***

Joker, Frost, and his three henchpeople (one named Chuck already screwed up) were searching for the locked safe. Joker had grown impatient for not being able to find the safe as quickly as he anticipated. Frost could sense his boss's frustration growing each time they entered a room only to find out it was an office or it was filled with storage. They had to find the safe fast, or the boss would fire his gun at the remaining henchpeople and blame them for not findng the safe fast enough, which meant that Frost had to hire recruits( which he found tedious). Frost used to do the job before Harley came along, so Joker and Harley would be the ones who would hire people. But since Harley left, Frost got stuck with the job again. That was one reason why he hoped Harley would come back and be with Joker again.

*** 

Harley put her head together to follow the complex map. The map had three pages front and back stapled on and made it confusing as hell. 

" Who de fuck did dis, or what?" She muttered to herself. Harley eventually thought to scrap the map and just go around and punch the entrance to find the safe. Minutes later of punching and bat hitting, she finally nailed the room filled with money.

" Dere she is!" Harley let out a sigh of relief and carefully tried to jump down. A big thump noise was made as she landed on her feet. The money was stacked on top of each other, making rolls of money. Green here and green there. She grinned as she pulled a plastic bag out of her jacket and began to fill it. The bag filled immediately, and she pulled out another one and started to fill it until she heard the door unlock and slowly open. Harley reacted quickly and dropped to the floor so she could hide behind the stack of money. She grabbed her bat, ready to attack if she needed to. Her heart began to race rapidly as she heard footsteps. Not just one person, but it seemed to be several. Harley did her best to see who it was without getting caught, but it was difficult to determine who exactly it is. 

" Finally! We found this stupid safe. Why did this bank make it so damn complicated! And for that, we'll burn this place to the ground." A burst of obnoxious laughter followed after. Right there and then, she knew that voice and that laughter that she missed hearing daily; it was The Joker. Harley remained on the floor, waiting for the right moment to leave since he claimed that they would burn the bank down. The three henchpeople went around and filled the sacks that they brought with them. The only guy left in the small group got nearer and nearer to Harley’s hiding spot. She did her best not to move so no one could see that she was present. Out of luck, as she scooted over to the other side, her baseball bat began to roll. Harley cursed under her breath and slid down to the floor, moving the stack of money forward.

The guy henchman turned around and walked towards the sound and found Harley lying on the floor. 

“ Boss! Bossman!” Joker stood next to Frost, talking about something until it got interrupted. Joker narrowed his eyes and pointed at his henchman.

“ Yes, Bozo! Bobo! Bogus! What is it?” The guy frowned and corrected Joker.

“ My name is Bernard, sir.” This received an exaggerated eye roll and groan from his boss. 

“ Whatever. Do you actually think I remember people’s names? Uh, what kind of name is Bernard anyway? Did your parents not want you that they free willingly gave you that name. Uh!” Joker faked gagged and laughed right after making Bernard uncomfortable and regretting his decision to join Joker’s gang.

“ Okay, I’m done. What do you want?” Instead of talking, Bernard simply pointed to the floor, meaning that he found something. Joker cocked a green eyebrow and motioned for Frost to go check it out. Frost followed his orders and moved towards what Bernard was pointing at. Frost’s eyes widened in surprise as he saw Harley on the floor.

“ Miss Quinn?!” Frost tried his best to whisper but failed as everyone else heard his reaction. Harley smiled awkwardly and waved at him. “ Hiya Frost. It’s been a while. Heh.” Joker immediately speed-walked towards both of them. Once he made it, he got closer to her. He smiled, and it wasn’t his typical smile; his smile showed that he genuinely felt happy to see her. Harley slowly rose from her feet since she no longer had a reason to hide. 

“ Why is little old Harley Quinn doing at the bank by herself this fine morning?” Joker’s tone didn’t have a hint of threat or menace in it. More like a teasing sound with some hint of elegance. 

Harley took a small gulp. “I need tuh finance myself fawh ...de week. Duh.” Joker could tell that this girl is lying from her eyes, moving all over the place and from that short pause.

“ Really?”

“ Yup. Now excuse me. I have a busy day today.” She ducked to get her stolen money and her baseball bat. Harley went to the other side to exit because Frost and Joker were blocking her way. As she walked towards the door, Harley raised her bat to the ceiling and waved back and forth.

“ Well, it was nice seein' yuh all, but I must go. Ya' dig? If yuh wanna see me, visit any time. Okay? Dat’s if yuh find me.” Harley laughed to herself and left the room. The room fell silent for a while until Joker broke it.

“ I think it’s funny how she thinks I don’t know where she’s been all this time.” He chuckled. “ Alright! Wrap everything up, and let’s go.” 

***

Harley and Ivy stood in front of the empty building where their future sandwich shop will be.  
“ This is it huh,” Ivy spoke in disbelief that this is actually going to happen. Harley was all smiles gazing up at the building. 

“ Here it is, Red! I can’t believe dat dis is ackshully happenin'! Oh, we’re gonna have so much fun-” Harley kept on blabbering about all of the possible future events that could occur. While Ivy wasn’t fully ready to do this, but she had to since that’s what friends are for.


	2. The Opening

“ Ooo.What about dis one Red?” Harley pointed at a mahogany leather couch that could hold two people. Ivy had been observing the plastic plants section wondering if she should get one to decorate the shop. Harley had woken up Ivy around five in the morning to discuss their plans to remodel. The two girls went all over Gotham’s furniture stores looking for new tables, new decorations to hang up, etc. The current blueprints for the new restaurant had Harley written all over it. Since Ivy is a part of this too, she decided to put in some things that other people will associate with her. Ivy held a small pot plant and turned to face Harley.

“ Hmm. Why do we need a couch?” Harley jumped on the couch and laid back.

“ Uh, So folks can sit and relax, or hang out. Duh.” Harley made a face to her friend saying that ‘isn’t it obvious’.

“ And also vomit, piss on it, stain it with food or bodily fluids,” Ivy remarked while petting the plastic green plant. Harley sat up fully and raised a brown eyebrow.

“What. Dey won’t do dat. We’re villains dey’ll respect us. Okay? “

Ivy sighed and ran her hand through her red hair.” Oh, come on Harls. This is Gotham we’re talking about. Villains or not, there still will be disgusting vile humans who won't think twice or give a shit and do as they please. More likely since you have had intercourse on a couch out in public.” Ivy then stepped towards her and placed her plant in the full shopping cart holding things like new kitchen utensils, cloth napkins, and rugs.

" What makes yuh assume dat I have done dat?" 

Ivy narrowed her green eyes." Really? Tell me straight to my face that you have not had sex on a couch out in public before." Harley in a hot minute could swear to herself that she has never done that. She did her best to concentrate and remember any sort of action. After a couple of minutes had passed, Harley was about to deny it until a spark lit up in her brain. Well, there was this one time she thought.

***

One New Year’s Eve, Joker and Harley celebrated their victory from accomplishing their mission and being able to escape Batman and his sidekick. Harley had been in the mood for donuts that night, so Joker took her to a nearby cafe. The two clowns had been in such a good mood that things got heated between them. The owner and the other two workers were tied up near a corner facing the wall.

" Oh Pumpkin, you looked so good when you were hitting poor Batsy with your bat there." Joker gave a small giggle that drove Harley crazy. The two of them were sitting next to each other on a shiny black couch that the cafe provided. Harley got an inch closer to Joker and with one hand slowly caressing his knee.

"Oh Puddin, yuh looked so handsome as yuh were givin' your speech tuh de Bat. Yuh with me?" She twisted her red lips into a smile. Joker went ahead and placed both of his hands on her back so he could embrace her. He ran his gloved hand over her back and stroked her for a good while until he pushed her a few inches back. He pressed his red lips onto hers gently before he went in for a deep passionate kiss. Harley deepened the kiss as she then started to take his purple jacket off as so the rest. Joker obliged her actions as he did the same. Sooner or later they were both almost nude as they eventually made love on the couch. 

***

"Okay, I did dat one time Ive." Ivy responded by making a facial expression meaning that she didn't believe Harley.

" Okay, two times!" Ivy cocked an eyebrow still having the look of disbelief.

" Fine three times!" Ivy still hadn't changed her expression which began to annoy Harley. 

" Yuh know. You're right. No couch." Harley stuck her bottom lip and narrowed her eyes as she got up from the couch. She then crossed her arms and walked past her friend. Ivy just laughed to herself and simply walked towards Harley's direction.

***

The Romano Family, the former owners of ' All You Need is Subs' were standing outside the shop with the company of Harley and Ivy. Paul and his wife Concetta ( Who was slightly younger than her husband. She also had been taller than him by a few inches) were finishing loading up their van with boxes filled with their belongings. Their daughter ( around Harley’s age) was on the phone contacting their food supplier talking about how they should still deliver at the same location, but the only difference was the change in owners. The eldest son took out the for lease sign and replaced it with a sign that said sold. The Romano Family did all of their tasks in a slow orderly fashion way since all four were devastated by leaving their 35-year family business. Half an hour later, Concetta closed the glass door of the shop with the keys in her hand and moved towards Harley. 

Once Concetta got close to Harley, she reached for Harley’s pale hand and dropped the keys. She then proceeded to close Harley’s hand so she could get a good grip on the keys.

“ Wel-l-a, Mis-s arrrley Qooin-n-a. She’s al-l yourrrs now-a. I know you'rrre bad-a, boot please take good carrre of er-a.” Harley smiled at the lady and unfolded her hand to see the dull dimed gold keys. She put her index finger into the keychain and played with it as she was moving it in circles.

“Don’t wawhry Mrs.R. I’ll take good care of your fawhmuh establishment.” Harley winked.

“Good-a. If tat clown evoi comes back again-a. Show im ow good you’rrre doing without im-a. Show im tat you arrre badas-s because al-l women need to know tat dey arrre capable of doing anything-a. Joost look at me and my oosband-a.” Concetta pointed at Paul as he was organizing the boxes. Paul instantly turned his head to face his wife and the girls.

“ What now?” Concetta giggled and turned back to him.

“ Nothing Pauly go back to worrrk.” Paul did as she said and stopped questioning their conversation.

“ See what I tel-l you.” Concetta toned her voice down so only Harley and Ivy could hear. She wished them farewell and turned back to her former restaurant once more before she headed towards the passenger side of the van. Paul closed the trunk and ran his palm against his sweaty head. He went back to the girls and said his goodbyes by shaking their hands. Soon after he shook Ivy’s hand and went back towards his van, Ivy immediately wiped her hand against her clothing. Even though she’ll be working around other humans, that didn’t mean she’ll start liking them, especially those who have dealt with selling greens to only be consumed. Harley and Ivy finally said goodbye to the Romano kids and watched them leave to who knows where. 

Both of them in unison moved to face the front of the shop and stood in silence. Neither of them said one word until Ivy decided to break the silence.

“ How come that Paul guy doesn’t speak with an accent?” 

“ Oh, it’s becawze his wife is Italian. She ackshully came here from Italy when she was little. Yuh with me? Paul on de othuh hand was a custmmoi here and dat’s how he met huh. So yuh know, dey fell in love, got hitched, and had babies.” Harley stretched her arms and yawned. Maybe getting up at four-thirty in the morning wasn’t such a good idea. 

“ Are you really going to ruin a family’s most memorable moments by simply taking over just so you can get yourself a free sandwich?” Ivy crossed her light green arms as she thought about how much she still didn’t want to do this, but she had to. Harley pondered about Ivy’s question for a while. Was it selfish of her to demand them to sell their shop to her? Where years of family memorabilia this place held. Only to sadly end and end up with a girl who her only reason to own it was just so she could get a free sandwich. Harley contemplated more about the question before answering it thoughtfully.

“Oh, cawhse I am!” Harley grinned then took a peek at the keys that are now hers. She closed her hand to make a grip and ran to the entrance of the shop. The blonde opened the glass door and headed inside. Seconds later, the door opened with Harley’s head sticking out.

“What are yuh waitin' fawh Red. Come on in! Okay? We have so much wawhk tuh do!” She yelled excitedly as she closed the door once more. Ivy groaned and lazily walked to the door.

***

The next couple of hours, Harley and Ivy took all the tables outside, swept the floor, cleaned the windows, and started to replace the old kitchen utensils. At this point, neither of them knew exactly how to replace the tile floor or other repairments they had planned to do. So it was Ivy who decided for them to take a break and brainstorm.

“ Have you thought of anything Harls?” Ivy sat on the floor near the counter while Harley leaned against the wall having her fingers twist her pigtails. 

“ No.” Harley sighed, but suddenly her eyes widened as an epiphany took place. “ Wait, I know a guy! He wawhks in dis department. He did remodel my apartment!” Harley reached for her pocket on her shorts and pulled out her red shiny phone. 

Ryan, an average forty-year-old man who was a bit on the heavier side arrived an hour later with his crew. Ryan had been a loyal acquaintance to The Joker and Harley Quinn from all the times they needed someone to construct or remodel a building. The guy had always been more than happy whenever he would get a phone call from either of them saying that they have a job for him. Ryan and his crew came in bursting through the front door with some of their equipment in their hands ready to go. Harley hurried over to him while holding her blueprints with having Ivy follow.

“ Ryan! I need yuh again.” Harley grinned as she handed him the blueprints. Ryan took the paper to then unfold it and quickly took a once over. 

“ Alright. I will try to get this done soon. I’ll do anything for you so your boyfriend won’t come hunting me down later.” Ryan chuckled as he refolded the paper and motioned his crew to go to the back of the shop. Ivy raised her eyebrow while glancing at Ryan and then at Harley who was standing right next to her.

“ He does know that you broke up with that clown right,” Ivy whispered to Harley quite loudly so the others could hear. Her plan worked when Ryan stopped his duties and turned back around.

“ What did she say?!” Harley’s heart started to pound in panic. So Harley in a flash she raised her arm and slapped her palm on Ivy’s lips. Ivy furrowed her eyebrows as she attempted to speak, but everything came out muffled. 

“ Oh, don’t listen tuh huh. She just likes tuh spread false rumawhs. I get quite annoyed when she says stuff like dat. It also annoys My Puddin very much. Right?” Harley highly emphasized her nickname for Joker so Ryan would fall for the idea that she never broke up with him. At some point, Harley grabbed Ivy’s waist close to her so the redhead wouldn’t leave. Ivy kept on tugging but Harley’s grip would get tighter. Ryan saw Harley’s strange actions but didn’t make much of it.

“ Oh, okay then.” Ryan smiled in relief and proceeded to give his crew directions. Harley removed her palm and grabbed Ivy by her green hand. Before Ivy could say anything Harley pulled her outside. She let go of Ivy and looked back at the windows of the shop. Once she made sure that the guys couldn’t hear them, Harley swiftly turned to confused Ivy.

“ Man, dat was a close one.” Harley wiped her hand against her forehead. “ Red, yuh can’t just shout out tings like dat!” At this moment Ivy probably made a whole load of questions where she didn’t know where to start.

“ Uh, why? Doesn’t everybody know that you are no longer with Joker? It was on the news for god sake.” Ivy clarified.

“ Well no, and Ryan is one of those. If he finds out de truth...it’ll break his heart.” Harley tilted her head forward.

“ What?” 

" Yeah, he enjoys seein' us togethuh becawze he said we remind him of his relashunship wit' his ex-wife. Yuh got me so fahr? Dat as long as we are togethuh he has hope dat he and his ex-wife will get back togethuh." Harley simply stated and shoved her hands in the pockets of her shorts.

Ivy cocked an eyebrow as she had never been so confused in her life." That makes no fucking sense but whatever. Plus what did you tell him when he remodeled your apartment?"

" Oh, dat it will be our tempawhary place fawh when we hide from Bats. Yuh with me?" Harley kicked around the cement ground while looking down.

" Anudder point dat he doesn't know is dat Joker kept my babies!" 

" Bud and Lou?" 

" Yes! Can yuh believe he refused tuh give dem tuh me! Okay? He's all like ' I'm de one who gave dem tuh yuh, so I have every right tuh keep dem." Harley made a brief attempt at mimicking Joker's recognizable voice. Which had become one of Harley's habits from all of her spare time. Ivy never understood Harley's relationship with Joker in the first place. Well, she didn't understand relationships in general. Ivy didn't see the point in being in love with some other human being. Just so they can fight and depend on them. Uh, that's too much work, she thought. That's why having plants is so much easier to have in life. No fights, no complications, no depending, and no responsibility. 

Ryan and his crew removed all the Prussian blue tile and replaced it with Scarlet tile. The walls were painted in a ruby red, cream white, and black diamond pattern. They kept the chandelier but added a few lamps around. Pure white round tables were added as so four booths. Paintings of clowns, circus tents, and carousels hung on the walls. The counter was broken down so a display case could replace it. The outside was remodeled too. The former sign had a few tears and the white letters were slightly faded. The new sign is black with having LED letters that light up with pink and blue. It only took three days to complete the whole look as the opening day came closer. Harley gave Ryan and his crew coupons ( that she had already made) for her shop as their payment. Some of the guys didn't like Harley's form of payment but chose not to say anything because they were scared of what might happen if they refused. Harley had been squealing and jumping up and down at the interior of her sandwich shop. Ivy brought some plastic plants and placed them where she thought it'll look nice. Instead of entering from the front, it was Harley's idea to enter from the back so everything could be a huge surprise.

" Oh, Red doesn't everythin’ look amazing!" Harley had her eyes wide open as she had been in awe. Even though everything had been in Harley's colors, she did have to admit that the place looked nice. Well compared to the other restaurants in Gotham, this was probably one of the most decent places there is. 

" You know, usually I'm not a fan of all of this. Ivy raised her green index finger and spun circles to show the whole room. “ But I gotta say it does look divine.” She turned her mouth into a soft grin. Harley squealed once more and hurried to Ivy and grabbed her wrist. 

“ Ooo! Let’s go to see de front! Okay!” Harley dragged Ivy to the door and kicked it right open. She rushed outside as she slipped a little from the excitement. The LED sign shined bright as if it was a sign for a bar or a nightclub of some sort. The girls back away a few steps to get a good view of the sign.

“ So that’s what you decided to call it.” The big LED letters spelled out ‘H.Quinn’s Subs’ with her name in pink and subs in blue. Throughout the entire process, Harley hadn’t chosen a name for her or their restaurant.

“ Yeah, I was havin' trouble wit' de name. Right? I couldn’t decide between dis or Sandwiches by Harley. Yuh got me so fahr?” It got silent for a minute as the two best friends gazed at the shop sign.

“ You don’t think Batman would come right?” Ivy added.

“ Based on how he is. He’s probably going to appear. Bats is such a party pooper.” She stuck her tongue out and kicked the cement ground. Ivy just nodded and everything went silent again.

***

Opening day came knocking on the front door to get invited in. Ivy stapled a few posters all over Gotham (since Harley requested) a week before the grand opening. The girls were finishing setting everything up and making sure it was perfect. First impressions are always a big deal because it could determine someone's future and have a higher percentage of being accepted. The hand on the clock struck noon which meant it was time to open the fucking place. Harley skipped to the entrance and flipped on the open sign and taped a paper reading ' Now Open'. Her heart was racing at the thought of opening her sandwich shop to all of Gotham. Ivy had her red hair tied back into a tight low ponytail with a few hairs sticking out to act as her side bangs. She wore a plain black t-shirt with dark green capris shorts. Ivy stood behind the display case counter ready to get this over with. Harley skipped right back wearing a red and black corset with red leather pants.

" Oh Red! We still need tuh put on our unifawhms!" Ivy released a quizzical expression. ' Uniforms? She never mentioned uniforms' Ivy pondered. Harley went to the back and opened up a closet right next to the restrooms. She came out with an opened box and placed it on the counter. Ivy took a peek inside the box but couldn't quite make out what it was. Harley fully opened the brown box and smiled big as she raised a white apron. The apron had a black box with the shop's name on it and had thin green vertical stripes going down.

"Here yuh go! Dis one's yawhs! Okay!" She handed it over as Ivy took it and got a good look. Harley insisted on her friend to put it on by motioning with her blue eyes. Ivy calmly went through the entrance of the apron and tied the back. Harley clapped and then got hers out which was exactly the same except the colors of the stripes were red and black. She instantly put on her apron and sighed happily.

" Alright let's do dis ting!" 

The next two hours passed by while the clock kept on ticking and the brief sounds of cars driving filled the background. Not one single customer had taken the chance to pay a visit. Ivy had been sitting at one of the booths (bored) messing around with one of the fake plants by controlling it to make the leaves longer and shorter. Harley leaned on the display counter groaning and eventually dropped her head on the counter. The blonde pigtailed girl began to question her whole idea of opening this place. Was this a good idea in the first place? 

“ Ah, Why isn’t anyone comin’!” Harley slammed her fists against the counter.

“ Well, this is a sandwich shop run by villains. I don’t know about you, but if I were a ‘normal’ civilian, I wouldn’t think twice about not coming here.” Ivy remarked while still playing with her plants. Harley sighed and banged her head against the transparent plastic case counter once more. A young lady with orange hair who a simple gray t-shirt and blue jeans suddenly opened the door and step right in. The girl seemed confused to see Ivy playing with plants while Harley had her head down. Neither of them noticed the girl walk into the shop. Instead of leaving, the girl walked up towards Harley and paused to look at the menu. The girl thought about her order for a few minutes before she gently tapped the counter. Ivy had been too distracted until she heard a noise beside her. So she stopped controlling the plant and turned to where the strange noise was coming from. Her lips partly opened when she noticed that they finally got their first customer. Harley still hadn’t risen until the girl tapped the counter once more. On the second try, Harley rose hallway to meet the girl’s hazel eyes. She quickly blinked before her realization.

“ Uh, Can I order?” The girl questioned. Harley suddenly revealed a huge smile and caught the girl by surprise by squeezing her tightly. The girl quickly regained her breath once Harley let go.

“ Of Cawhse yuh can! Okay? What would yuh like, or what?” Harley asked as she got her notebook ready to write down her order. Ivy got out of the booth and went straight to the kitchen. 

“ Can I get a simple turkey sandwich but can you add pickles? With a medium lemonade.” Harley finished writing down her order as Ivy started on her drink. The girl paid for her meal and went back to sit at one of the tables. Luckily right after the girl entered, two other guys entered holding hands and ordered. Harley finished the girl’s order while Ivy took the guy’s orders and started on theirs. Soon or later a small family of three entered the shop and stood in front of the counter. Harley and Ivy took turns receiving the orders and making them. Out of the blue, a long line compiled while both girls were beginning to lose track of the orders. 

“ Hey! Green bitch! I’ve been waiting for over an hour for my goddamn sandwich!” The older guy had been sitting near one of Ivy’s plants, so raised her hand and used her power so the plant could tangle the guy and shut his mouth.

" Give me a minute dick!" Ivy called out angrily. Harley also had trouble seeing the line of people waiting in line. If only there was a way that the people could still order but without them standing in line. Harley dismissed that thought and continued to go back to work. As closing time got closer only two people were left eating while Harley and Ivy leaned against the display case being totally exhausted.

" Well, dat was somethin.” Harley spoke tiredly. Ivy’s ponytail became loose with more hairs sticking out. Both of their aprons were stained and so their skin.

“ So there you got the experience. Are we done here?”

“Umm.No. Okay? Aftuh today I figure out what we need tuh continue. Yuh got me so fahr?”

Ivy groaned loudly. “ What?”

Harley met her blue eyes with Ivy’s green eyes. “ We need a toid person.” 

***

Ivy was in the kitchen with her apron on already and her hair loose. Harley told her that she’ll be a little late but she didn’t mention why. Yesterday went had been just as a disaster as the first day. Harley was right they did need more help but who would agree to work with them? Right then the back door ( which was in the kitchen) unlocked where Harley had entered.

“ Why are you late?” Ivy didn’t sound angry but curious. Harley gave an embarrassed smile and giggle.

“ Oh, I found someone tuh help us.” Harley nervously chuckled as she stepped to the side to give Ivy a good view of the door entrance. Out of all days, the sun chose to shine bright as all Ivy could see was a tall shadow. She could make out more of it as the shadow got closer, but Ivy still couldn’t see who it was. All she could say was that the person had been male since the shadow had no curves. Something about the silhouette seemed familiar by the way it had been standing.


	3. The Third

" Well hello! Harley's tree friend." The mysterious silhouette spoke. Ivy rolled her eyes when she heard that annoying dreadful voice that she had to deal with over the years.The sunlight dimmed out to focus on the new third employee of H.Quinn's Subs. The third worker stepped inside the kitchen and there he was, the pale man. The man with that sickening emerald hair. Those disgusting red lips that formed a disgusting smile with all his pearl aligned teeth showing. The guy who finds all the madness and chaos in the world funny. It was the one and only” The Joker.” Ivy would rather be dared to consume vegetables than work with that fool. The redhead rotated her head towards her friend. Harley still had her nervous smile when Ivy focused on her. Ivy took in a handful of air and exhaled.

" Harls. I need a minute with you." Before Harley could respond, Ivy grasped her wrist and pulled her outside the door Joker came in. The blonde gasped, and felt a bit of pain on her wrist when Ivy slammed the door closed and let go.

" Joker. Really?" Ivy crossed her arms as some small vines shifted around them.

" I knew yuh were gonna be like dis. But Joker wasn't my first choice" Harley looked down and lazily played with her foot. But soon rose to met Ivy's focus.

"I wanted Catwoman. Okay? So we could be like de three musketeers or de three amigos. Yuh with me? Yuh knows like Charlie's Angels. Den we could take pictures and pose so den I can put it on de wall. Ya' dig? But when I found huh, she said dat she had an impawhtant jewelry heist dat she was plannin'." After Selina rejected Harley's invitation, the blonde traveled around Gotham to find someone who would like to join them. She tried others like Quelle and Lark but they also had been busy with their missions. Harley also tried to get other villains like Bane, Two-Face, Scarecrow, and Hatter but they all said the same thing which was no. The next plan was to ask random deprived Gothamites. Several of the citizens ran when they saw the crazy jester go near them. Others pretended that they were either blind as a bat or that they were deaf. So the last resort Harley could think of was her formal hideout.

“ How the hell did you convince him to work with us?” Ivy raised an eyebrow.

“ I told him...he could get half of de pruhvit and he is now. Okay?..de co-ownuh of H.Quinn’s Subs. Yuh with me?” Harley cringed slightly. Ivy didn't speak for a minute and narrowed her eyes. The redhead's breaths gradually became quicker and she lowered her arms to make tight fists.

“ You-uu. Made him co-owner and not me! He wasn’t there on day one! He didn’t wake up at five in the FUCKING morning every single day to discuss plans! He wasn’t there for any of it and you had the AUDACITY to make him co-owner! That’s...that’s an injustice!” Harley's eyes opened wide to see her friend's sudden outrage that she could have sworn that she saw smoke coming out of Ivy's green ears.

“Dang, dat’s a lot of heat fawh someone who didn’t even wanna do dis in de first place. Plus we need him Red. Ya' dig? I’m sawhry but de two of us aren’t enough. Okay? Also, he’s de only one dat agreed tuh join." Harley went to touch Ivy on the shoulder so she could take a breather. " I don’t know how Spongebob and Squidward manage tuh run de Krusty Krab and deir lines get full.”

Ivy whined and threw her head back.“ Fine.” She went for Harley's hand and gave it a firm squeeze. Harley patted her back as she proceeded to open the door and stepped right in where Ivy followed.

Joker had his violet suit jacket off and hung it on a hanger where the rest of the aprons were. He sat at a table close to the counter having his feet crossed on top while whistling to the tune of “ The Greatest Show”. Joker turned his full attention to the kitchen when he heard the door creak open. Watching a smiling Harley and a "happy" Ivy re-enter. Ivy stopped at the counter and leaned against it. Harley paused at the apron hanger and grabbed one. She put it behind her back and headed towards Joker's direction( having a small smile painted on her face).

“ So welcome tuh H.Quinn’s Subs and we are thrilled fawh yuh tuh join us.” Harley pulled out the apron to show Joker. The apron had the same design as the other two but the stripes were green and purple. Joker received the apron and immediately got out of the chair to put on the apron. Once he had it on, he surprised Harley by reaching for her hand and placed his on top.

“ Oh, I bet you are. It’s my pleasure to join you and the plant ." He leaned down and raised her hand to brush his red lips. Joker gently kissed her knuckles and released her hand. Harley felt her face warm by Joker’s sudden touch. She felt a small vibration occur and took a small gulp. No one said one word while Harley touched her hand where Joker kissed her and met his tense blue eyes.

" Umm. So are we starting?" Ivy sensed the awkward tension between the two and thought to herself if Joker agreeing to work with Harley was a good idea. Ivy's voice brought a spark that lit Joker and Harley to wake from their daze.

“ That reminds me. I’m going to take my ten-minute smoke break.” Joker stated and moved past Ivy.

“ It takes yuh ten minutes tuh smoke? Also, how can yuh take a break if yuh haven’t even done anythin'?” Joker was already behind the counter ready to exit the shop and turned around with his hands in his pockets.

“ Well Harley, this is my first day. I need to prepare myself before anyone gets here. I REALLY want to make my first impression a GOOD one.” He giggled like a troubled child who was ready to plot his next prank.

“ Anyway, I’ll be back in ten.” Joker made his way to the back door and closed it shut. Harley sighed and walked to the front glass door to flip the close sign.

“ You’re not going to fall for him again, are you? I mean you two surprisingly had a good relationship until he broke your heart.” Ivy asked worryingly. After the breakup, Harley stayed with Ivy for a while before she was ready to get on her feet again. Harley was devastated, all day and night she'll cry, eat junk food, and watch The Notebook, Titanic, and The Twilight Saga on repeat. She watched them so much that Ivy got sick of them and now every time that movie showed, the redhead would just think of sad Harley. Even though Harley moved on past that state and is doing fine now, Ivy still believes and is sure that there is part of Harley's heart that still has feelings for her ex-clown boyfriend. The former clown couple had a healthy relationship like any other. Many people in Gotham sort of envied their relationship on how good they were for each other. Some of them made rumors and accusations that The Joker and Harley Quinn had a toxic, abusive, one-sided relationship. The theories went on that Joker is incapable of experiencing love and that he was only using Harley by manipulating her. Joker and Harley had been upset by the false rumors and tried debunking them, but some people didn’t change their view.

" I-I...I. No. I'm not givin' him any second chances. " Harley spoke lightly as she turned around and walked back to the counter.

" I'm bettuh than dat." She took a deep breath."We're just gonna be cowawhkers. Nuttin' maw." Harley took a small pause before changing her attitude.

She flung her arms in the air and yelled, "Yuh ready Red! Ready fawh anudder excitin' day!"

Ivy groaned and spoke in a sarcastic tone," Yeah, I'm so excited." Harley smiled and rushed to get her apron.

***

A long dreadful hour had passed and only two customers decided to come in. Both of them didn't dine in and just wanted take out. Guess today was one of those slower days. Harley had been leaning forward on the display counter having her chin touching the glass. Ivy stood next to her observing the front door with her arms crossed. The only noise that filled the room was the whistling of Joker who sat at one of the booths.

" Ugh, it's like two o'clock already. And only two scared people came. What am I doin' wrong?" Harley sighed.

" I said this before, but I don’t care, I'm going to say it again. Why would any normal people go to a restaurant where the place is run by villains?"

" We did get quite a few de last two days."

" More people came on the first day. This could be a stretch but I think the number would only decrease when new or old customers see you know who as their waiter." Ivy pointed a finger as she met contact with Joker who stopped whistling. He scooted to the end and rose to his feet.

" It's not my fault that the people in Gotham are most terrified of moi. Speaking of which, did you see the look on the first guy's face?" Joker began to chuckle before he continued. " I swear he almost shit his pants when I said ‘ dining in or takeout.’ He burst into laughter while holding onto his sides. “ Damn, who knew this job could be entertaining.” Joker wiped his tears from his eyes to then face Harley and smiled.

“ See Ive, I told yuh dis will be fun. Joker tinks so.” Harley took her chin off the counter and stretched her arms. Ivy didn’t open her mouth but rolled her eyes. The doorbell chimed and there stood a woman dressed in a female version of The Riddler’s usual outfit.

“ Hiya Quelle! Nice to see ya!” Harley waved from the counter. Quelle smiled and made her way to the front. She took a halt and snatched a minute or two to take in all of her surroundings.

“ This place looks nice. I’m sorry Harley that I couldn’t help you. It’s just that I’m involved in Riddler’s next scheme that I don’t have time to myself.” Quelle shrugged.

“ Why thank yuh. Don’t worry about not helpin'. I already figured dat out.” Harley motioned to her right where Joker sat back down in the booth. Quelle curiously followed Harley’s direction and was surprised to see who the third employee was. She then looked back at Harley in shock.

“ Joker’s the third?” she whispered. Harley nodded and grabbed her notebook and pen.

“ So what’s your order?”

Quelle glanced at the top menu above Harley's head for a minute before she made her decision.“ Uhh. A basic BLT and a steak Ruben with both having normal fries please.” Harley copied down Quelle’s order while Ivy began to gather the ingredients.

“ Wow. Your basic normal french fries. How boring! Not even something more adventurous like curry fries or I don’t know waffle fries. But French fries?” Joker commented. Quelle debated whether she should ignore the clown or not.

“ French fries are Riddler’s preferred option.” She stated.

“ No wonder. He’s such a basic bitch.” Joker giggled. “ What’s that dork doing anyway?” Before Quelle could answer Joker, cut her off. “ You know what saves it. I want to be surprised.” He laughed once more and gradually got on his feet and walked to the entrance with his hands behind his back. Seven minutes later the bell on the counter rang with Harley having Quelle’s order ready in her hands.

“ Order up!” Harley called out smiling. Quelle retrieved the takeout bag and dropped her money on the counter. Sooner or later she made her way out the door. Right after a family of four entered the shop. A father, a mother, an older son, and a young daughter. The mother instantly felt chills running down her backbone. She hadn’t been a real fan of the circus theme. Especially clowns. She expressed a hint of worry on her face and spoke softly to her husband,” Are you sure about this?” Just about her husband could respond, Joker jumped in front of them since he had been hiding on the side. The father and mother jumped at his sudden appearance as the son had been busy on his phone and the daughter was busy playing with her teddy bear.

“ Howdy! Folks. Dining or takeout?” Joker asked the family.

“ Uhh…dining in.” The father made eye contact with his wife who just glared at him. Joker gestured them to one of the booths and grabbed a pile of menus (without counting them). The table made a big THUNK sound when the menus dropped.

“ Alright. Just holler when you’re ready. Don’t be shy.” The family proceeded to sit down when Joker left for the counter. The wife didn’t look happy as she continued to observe the sandwich shop. Since by the looks of it she's the only one who felt uneasy. The son and husband simply cracked opened their menus like nothing while the daughter was still playing.

“ Couldn’t we just stayed and wait at Subway?” The husband lifted his eyes off the menu and faced his wife.

“ No. Come on, we’ll have to wait over an hour in that line. We don’t have time for that. Plus there was no line here.” He returned his focus on the menu.

“ Ugh.” The wife slowly turned around to glance at Joker’s back (where he had been talking to Harley). She turned back to her family. “ Do you think they’re cosplayers or the real deal?” She whispered.

“ Well, this is Gotham dear, so I don't know. If we don't make trouble then we'll be fine." He returned his focus to the menu. The wife looked back around as she was searching for something. The son closed the menu and took out his Airpods.

" What are you looking for mom?" The son noticed his mom curiously moving her head around the shop. The woman stopped looking around and went back to her family's focus.

" Can you believe I need to go to the bathroom?" She brought to a whisper not wanting the villains to hear. " Do you think this place has a restroom?" The son shrugged as her husband closed his menu also.

" You could ask, hun." He pointed to the two clowns chatting where the green chick seemed to have disappeared somewhere. The wife's heart began to beat quickly while drops of sweat began to appear.

" What?"

" Yeah, it's simple just ask if there's a bathroom. Then if there isn't just go outside and pee or poop in an alley." She once again tried to see if there was one and then met back with her husband.

“ Can’t you ask? You did bring us here. The least you could do is ask.” Her voice was quite shaky. Her husband sighed,” Look you’re a big girl now. Quit acting like you’re five and get up and ask the clown.” The wife gave her husband the death glare as she slowly went to the edge of the seat.

“ How dare you embarrass me in front of the kids. Ugh, you’re not getting the ice cream I promise you.” She warned.

“ Good. I don’t even like ice cream.” The wife seemed offended as her husband placed his hand on her shoulder and pushed her off the seat. The son rolled his eyes and put one Airpod in his ear. “ You guys need to stop.” The mother slowly turned to face the counter. Her heart was pounding so fast against her chest that she felt like passing out.

***

Joker and Harley had been patiently waiting at the counter with Ivy leaving to go to the bathroom.

“ It’s a real shame when you specifically plan out a good joke to then have people not get it. Do you know how much that irritates me! And the worst part is that it happens the majority of the time.” Joker leaned on the display counter having most of his weight on his elbow. “ I mean killing them makes up for it, but one day I want the victim to laugh instead of pissing their pants. You know." Joker gave a loud sigh.

" Yeah, I getcha. Even though we get de joke it would be nice dat everyone did." She smiled. Joker stood up straight and looked at Harley.

" Two guys walk into a bar. You know they drink and talk. Then a pretty blonde girl comes up to them. She says ' Hey boys. Have you ever thought of spending the night with a blonde?' The two guys then follow the girl to the bathroom of the bar. Just when the guys were ready to proceed the girl undressed bottom down. One guy leaves the bathroom to finally realize that the bar was only filled with guys." Harley giggled. Joker followed her and started to chuckle. They laughed together for a good while until both of them eventually came to an end. Silence got welcome while the two of them just stared at each other. Harley glazed at Joker's tense blue eyes. His lovely red lips and his creamy white skin. The way the sun was hitting his hair made a beautiful shade of green. Harley just wanted to run her fingers through his hair and make it all messy. She came out of her daze when the woman spoke with fear in her voice.

" Umm… excuse me." Both Harley and Joker turned their attention to the woman.

" Hi. Umm. Do-o you guys have a room with a toilet and a sink. That I could use." The lady almost wanted to slap herself in the face. She didn't from all the nerves running through her spine.

" You mean a bathroom?" Joker answered. The woman took a bit to speak with her whole body slightly shaking.

" Yes-s. Do you have one?" Her eyes were wide open and her mouth twitching.

"Yeah. Go over to that end and turn and it's the first door on your right." Joker pointed so the woman could go, but she didn't move one muscle. She stood there looking at Joker with a scared expression.

" Are you going or not? You better not piss on the floor cause you're cleaning that mess not me." The woman still didn't move which made Joker lose his patience. So he stepped towards her and grabbed her shoulders and turned her in the direction of the bathroom. He then pushed her back to lead her. The woman's heart started beating rapidly when she felt Joker touch her and roughly push her. Her feet refused to move fast as they made it to the restroom. Just when Joker pushed the lady towards the door, Ivy came out and got out of the way as the woman was pushed inside. Ivy cocked an eyebrow and looked at Joker clueless.

" She didn't do what I said. " He shrugged. Ivy nodded in clarification and didn't make more of the situation.

***

The woman gave heavy pants and the sweating deliberately stopped. She moved towards the mirror which looked like a dressing room mirror from the movies. With white LED lights going around it and was the only source of light. The middle-aged lady stood in front of it and gripped the wide sink counter as hard as she could. Her eyes were the only thing she focused on. Terror filled her eyes. She must do something about this. Her family is no help at all. She could swear that if she got stabbed they'll probably scold her about how she could have prevented it. What could she do? Batman or the police was an option. Yeah, she'll just give them a call and tell them that three of Gotham's wanted villains are found. Well, are they though. These workers could be fake. Maybe they are fans and everything is dedicated or is a tribute to them. Also, the three of them haven't done anything wrong yet. But this whole thing is going to drive her mad if she doesn't find out if they are the real deal or not. Plus maybe if she takes action she'll get stabbed or get killed when it turns out that they are the real Joker, Harley, and Ivy.

" I need to do something." She reached for the sink and turned the metal faucet on. The woman cupped her hands and let the water run. She ducked her head and splashed the water on her face. " You can do this Carol." She smacked both of her cheeks with her wet hands and stood up. Carol walked towards the door but stopped after two steps. " I forgot. I do need to pee bad, then I'll take action."

***

" Harley here's table two orders." Joker handed Harley the order sheet. After the family of four entered it took a couple of minutes for a young couple to join. Harley grasped the order sheet and placed it on the rack so Ivy could also see. She began to search for all the ingredients. Ivy did her job and poured the drinks first. Joker observed Harley as she gathered all of the food. She did it funnily. With her pigtails bouncing every single time she bends down and rises back up. A few bottles tumbling down when she clumsily moved around. It had been quite entertaining to watch which made Joker chuckle a bit.

" Oh, Harley you're too much fun." Harley shot a glare at him, which made Joker tease her more. " What? I was just complimenting you. For once I did something nice and I get this treatment. I thought you liked me complimenting you." He didn't sound angry but calm. Harley looked up to him. She grunted. Joker had made his innocent expression with his red lips in a pout. His blue eyes appeared tenser and somehow his skin seemed to look softer. Harley hated all the times he did this face because she always thought he looked adorable. All she wanted to do was to give him a small peck on the cheek. Throughout the entire time, Harley had been distracted, she squeezed the mayo bottle while not seeing where she was placing it. The mayo bottle busted opened with all of the condiment spilling all over. Some of it squirted on her pale face and some got on her apron. Harley tsked and Joker giggled once more. Ivy muttered under her breath and went back to check the fries.

Carol's spouse glared at her as she came back from the bathroom. She still seemed uneasy but looked less scared. Carol shyly smiled at her husband as she sat back down. Her kids were also fed up with waiting for her. She picked up a menu that had been on top and skimmed through it.

" Jesus Christ. We've been here for fifteen minutes and you still haven't decided what to order." Carol dropped the menu and turned to her husband.

"Look, Harold. I'm sorry that clowns TERRIFY ME!" She remarked.

" Honey, you need to let go of that fear. So are you ready to order?" Carol nodded and Harold grinned. He sat up straight and shifted his view to a giggling Joker. Harold raised his arm all the way and cleared his throat. " Excuse me, my family is ready to order." Joker still chuckling grabbed his notepad and headed towards their booth.

" Okay, so what will we have today folks?" Joker reached for the pile of menus humming a tune. The son dropped his Airpod and stared at the clown waiter.

" I want a meatball sub with extra cheese. With a grape soda and curry fries." After the son was done giving his order, Harold got closer to his wife and spoke softly so only she could hear.

"See, there's nothing to worry about." They both turned to see Joker struggling to find his pen with his free hand as his other arm had been occupied holding the menus. The clown searched his pockets and patted his outfit several times. He even checked his ears to see if he placed it there and nothing. Joker looked back at the counter and found that the pen was nowhere. He released a small almost embarrassed laugh.

" Oops. I think I lost my pen. Silly me. Do any of you guys have a spare to let your Uncle Joker borrow?" The family exchanged looks and shook their heads. " That's a shame." He exhaled. Joker reached for his pocket once more and felt something sharp." Do you guys mind donating your blood for ink usage?" The family except for the daughter( who was still busy playing with her teddy bear) flinched. "Come on. Help a clown out. I promise you it will only sting for a bit. I'll even give you a band-aid after." The wife began to get overwhelmed once more. Her heart started racing and all of her anxiety rose. " You know what I take that back. Now that I think of it we don't have band-aids or what do you say a safety kit. So whoever volunteers will probably bleed out depending on the cut. So who's in?!" Joker fully pulled out his pocket knife and began to play with it by throwing it in the air and catching it. The family didn't speak one word just as they were confused about what to say. The son unhurriedly placed his earphones back on and shifted near his sister. He put on his hood and went to turn his music up. Harold tried his best to stay relaxed and did the best to avoid the situation. " Look folks we're going to be here all-day unless we figure out our little problem. I don't care if you starve. Just use your brains and solve the equation, Okay." Right there Carol thought that this was the perfect time to take action and do something about it. This does count as a threat right. She nervously met eye contact with that dangerous clown.

" I-I will give you my blood." She choked. Carol moved her left arm to give Joker better access. She made her hand into a fist and saw the blade gradually get close to her skin. Carol hissed slightly when the blade reached her skin and opened up as tiny drops of blood appeared. Joker dug a little deep and extended the cut. He didn't think that they would actually agree but whatever. Carol instantly rose from the seat and used all of her weight to push Joker off. Joker had been surprised by how much force that woman had since her arms looked fragile. That he slammed against the table behind him and dropped his knife. Carol immediately covered her cut and grabbed the pocket knife that Joker dropped. The woman pushed the clown into the other tables which made quite a ruckus. The other couple freaked out and switched tables closer to the front door. The woman's family was completely surprised at her actions but didn't say one word to stop her. Carol who is now a mess aimed the knife at Joker.

" Come at me clown! Show me what you got! Or are you afraid!" Carol warned even though her whole body shook. Joker narrowed his eyes and smiled big showing all of his teeth. He got away from the table and fixed his apron.

" Ooo. Are you threatening me? No one can threaten me, only I can." Joker took a couple of notches as Carol backed away and changed positions. " You're a brave one aren't you. For once I would like someone who stands up to me, to leave a mark on me. Because they usually just run their mouths and do nothing. You know as the saying goes 'dogs that bark don't bite, dogs that don't bark bite.' So which one is it deary? Are you just going to bark or are you going to bite?" Joker intimidated and brought another chuckle. Carol kept backing away until she hit the door still aiming the knife at Joker. This was her chance. She could leave and head towards the police station and tell them everything. They had to believe her, she had proof with her cut. But no, that would make her a coward. Her family would probably think of her being a failure and an embarrassment. She sprinted to Joker and fell onto the floor when he got out of the way. As soon as the clown got close to her Carol reached for the knife and attempted to stab his calf but failed. Her breaths accelerated and her heart pounded against her chest where it felt like it was going to burst out. Joker ducked down and grasped the knife to place it back in his pocket. He met with her pale face and sighed.

" I guess you're just like the rest of them. Man, I honestly got my hopes up. Ha, that day is probably going to happen when Destiny's Child releases a new album." Joker slid back his hair to only make it all messy.

" Destiny's Child broke up years ago. I doubt there is going to be any new album any time soon." The guy from the other table spoke.

" I know that's why I said it," Joker called back irritated without turning to see the guy." It's a real shame. I know I wasn't ready for fish jelly."

" You mean THIS jelly right." The same guy corrected Joker who was close to the front door. His girlfriend had her phone out recording and had been hugging her boyfriend for protection.

" What!? Are you telling me that the song says this jelly instead of fish jelly?" Joker fully turned with a cocked green eyebrow. The guy didn't say anything but nodded with his girlfriend doing the same.

Joker felt like he'd been lied to and confused. " I'll be damned. No wonder the people on the cruise ship didn't get my joke about the Joker fish. Ha, that was a good line though. I filled the fish with this toxic jelly or gelatin-like substance and when they were about to eat it, I made my grand entrance and I was like ' I hope you're all ready for fish jell-." Carol cut off Joker by using all of her strength to kick him right in his clown crotch. Joker yelped and groaned in pain and took the knife and made a large cut on Carol's other arm. She screamed in agony where this time Joker cut a little deeper. He dropped his pocket knife on the title floor and watched it slide. The knife stopped sliding since some foreign object seemed to have blocked it. Joker narrowed his eyebrows and squatted down curious about what exactly stopped the knife. Suddenly the bell on the display countered chimed.

" Table two's order is up! Okay? Come and get it, Joker… Joker what de fuck!?" Harley had the tray in her hands and cried out angrily to see the customers scared for their lives and to see a crying injured Carol on the floor. Joker unhurriedly got up from the floor to have a black ballpoint pen in his pale hand.

" Hey everybody! I found the pen! It turns out it was on the floor this entire time! No need for apologies."

" Apologies for what?" Harold asked astoundedly.

" You know for your wife attacking me and kicking me in the BALLS! And for that, you all are not getting any lunch!" Joker laughed with such tease.

" Joker! I doan want a bad review on Yelp! Okay? You're gonna take deir orduh and serve dem deir food!" Harley slammed the spatula against the transparent display counter.

" Ugh! Do I have to?" Joker groaned loudly like a young child.

" Yuh agreed tuh wawhk wit' me! So you'll do what I say becawze I'm de boss of yuh!" Harley snapped and slammed the counter with her fist.

" Woah! I'll do what you say geez." He smiled." I must say, I do enjoy aggressive Harley. See people this is what I'm talking about I need someone to stand up to me and leave a mark. Harley so far has been the only one besides Bats to affect me emotionally and physically." Joker scanned the whole room to make his point. He froze at Harley and brought his voice to whisper so only she could hear." I do say I kind of miss seeing an aggressive Harley Quinn." He winked at her to only make her cheeks heat up again.

" Here take dis tuh table two." Harley gave a small grin and shoved the tray to Joker.

" On it boss." Joker gave a salute like a soldier and retrieved the tray as he walked back to the young couple. Harley's smile increased in size when Joker turned his back to serve the couple.

Bleeding Carol still had been lying on the floor and furiously faced her husband. Harold was busy focusing on the clown and the other customers to feel his wife's stare. He followed Joker with his eyes when The Clown Prince of Crime finished serving the couple and darted the way back to the bathroom. Once the clown left, he noticed his wife's presence.

" You didn't do anything to protect me." She scolded.

" I told you to not interfere, but did you listen to me...no." Harold scolded her.

" How was I not. You and the kids didn't do anything. Tell me exactly how to avoid that situation." She barked back.

" I don't know. You should have just let him draw your blood peacefully and we could have eaten already." Harold answered with a hint of frustration.

" Are you kidding me?" Carol immediately rethought her decision of accepting to marry her husband

***

After a long day of hard work, Harley closed the shop and arrived at her apartment. That family of four wouldn't make a reappearance any time soon that's for sure. At least the rest of the day was somewhat decent. That long detailed talk with Joker calmed him down a bit, but Harley knew he won't completely follow her rules. Since that's just how that stupid handsome clown works. Harley yawned and stretched her arms when she entered her apartment and flicked the light switch on. She took off the jacket she wore ( that she kept a spare jacket in the shop just in case it got chilly later on) and placed it on a coat hanger she had next to the door entrance. Harley proceeded to take her shoes off and stretched even more. Today took off a bit of her stress with Joker joining the team. People waiting in line and not sitting down bothered Harley. Like why couldn't they just sit down and wait for their turn? But today was better. Plus who knows, maybe Joker could make things more fun. It's not like Ivy is boring or anything. She's great. Harley just thinks based on how Joker is, the whole experience of working there would be better.

Instead of going to lie in bed already, she decided to watch some tv for a while. Harley turned on the tv and picked a random channel. A commercial or teaser about a new dating show about to premiere was on. It showed the host, which was a lady with a great figure and face behind a white screen.

" Is there a guy or girl that's been on your mind? What is it about them that you're infatuated with? Is it their physical appearance or is it their personality? Or is it both?" The lady kept on talking about stuff relating to the show that Harley buzzed out. Her mind went onto the events of today. Her thoughts were filled with the actions of Joker and him saying things he'll typically say. Harley smiled in thought but then was interrupted by a familiar female voice.

 _"Harley! Harley! Can you hear me, Harley_!?" Harley groaned in realization.

" Ugh, What now Harleen?" Harley slouched back on the couch.

 _" A friendly welcome as always._ "

" What do yuh want now, or what?" Harley fully laid back.

 _" I'm a psychiatrist. It's my job to help the ones that are in need._ "

" What do I need yuh fawh? What problems do I have fawh yuh tuh fix?" Harley yawned once more.

 _" Oh, Harley. Don't you find it ironic how a former psychiatrist needs her normal sane self to give her advice to solve her problems_?" Harley tsked and got up from her couch to pace around.

" What problem do I have now dat yuh decided tuh visit?"

 _" The Joker_." Harley stopped pacing and froze in front of her bedroom door.

" What problem do I have wit' Joker?"

 _" Harley you mustn't fall for his tricks. You can't fall for him, Harley! Not after everything that happened_." Harley quickly moved in a circle and walked back to the living room/ kitchen.

" Look Harleen, I'm ovuh him. I'manna tells yuh de same ting I said tuh Red. Yuh with me? We're just gonna be co-wawhkers and that's it. I'm not goin' back tuh him becawze I'm not givin' him any second chances. Okay?" Harley stomped the floor and grunted.

 _" I sure hope so. Harley, I just want the best for you. Well for us_." She couldn't believe that she was having a discussion at night with the part of her that doubted herself. Not only she had to prove to her friend Ivy but she also had to prove to herself that she is done with that clown.

" Yuh know what. Here, by de end of dis. I will show yuh dat I no longuh have feelings fawh De Joker and we will still be separated. Ya' dig. He'll go back tuh do his ting and I will do mine. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley announced her goal and talked with her hands as if she was talking to someone else.

" _Good I want to see that. Make it happen, Harley Quinn."_

" Oh, just you wait and see." Harley grinned.


	4. The Reviews

Harleen patiently tapped her fingers on the wooden desk. Papers written with notes were scattered all over. She was wearing her typical outfit, which was a red top with a black skirt. With a doctor's coat over it, she had been waiting eagerly for her next meeting. Harleen had caught herself thinking and dreaming about her most dangerous patient during her free time. There was something about the guy that she found so fascinating. But it's so wrong. Harleen couldn't help but fall in love with the infamous Clown Prince of Crime. Their previous sessions had been less helpful. Instead of the normal-like sitting there and discussing, they have been doing activities that seemed more intimate lately. Like waltz dancing around her office and getting close together, too close.

Just right outside her door, she heard the distant laughing of The Joker with the guards shutting him up. Harleen smiled when the sound of their footsteps got nearer. Right after, there was a hard knock on the door.

" Dr. Quinzel, The Joker is ready!" The guard shouted out. Harleen gathered all of her paperwork, fixed her bun, and applied a bit of lip gloss. She pressed her shiny lips together before calling out.

" Okay, Enter!"

The door creaked open loudly and entered the two guards holding Joker. Even though she met Joker, he had on a straitjacket; he still managed to look attractive. The guards proceeded to throw the clown on the chair and cuffed both of his ankles.

" There. If you have any trouble, don't be scared to call for help." The guard rose to face Harleen.

" Yes. Thank you for your concern." She stated.

" It's my job." The guards replied and made sure Joker was secure before leaving for privacy. As soon as they left, Harleen checked that the close was clear as she got up from her seat to get to Joker. She then ducked down and freed him from both his cuffs and straitjacket. Joker stretched his arms as soon as he was free. Harleen dropped the jacket on her desk and resumed her focus.

" Missed you." He grinned. Harleen followed back as she sat on the edge of the desk.

" I missed you too. Our meeting was cut off short last time." She frowned.

" Yeah, Ivy just had to plan her escape where it caused mayhem with the others." Joker sighed.

" Why didn't you leave?" Harleen worried that Joker would have fled also. Since it was the logical thing to do as there was an option of escaping before him. Whatever his reasoning was, Harleen was happy he didn't.

" Believe me, I would if I wanted to, but it's not my time yet. I still need to accomplish my goal before I get out here." Joker got up from the chair and joined Harley on the desk.

" Would yuh care tuh share wit' me dat goal of yawhs?" Joker's eyes widened, and he froze in shock. She immediately looked to the floor and placed her hand to cover her mouth. Joker sat there in silence before he finally spoke.

" Enough about me. Since when do you have an accent? That's the real question, doc." Joker chuckled and got an inch closer.

" I-I always had it." She removed her focus from the floor and met with surprised Joker. " I tend to hide it so people can take me more seriously. Just like my glasses." She pushed her black frames up to her face.

" Bummer. I kind of like it, though." Joker smiled, which caused her to blush.

" You know. You said that we should stay true to ourselves, so you're breaking your own rules. So what else is there to Harley I don't know about." He tilted his head.

" Nothing." She replied.

" I have a request!" He raised his hand.

" From now on, I want you to be yourself to me. Meaning you will only talk to me in your accent, and even though you look lovely in those glasses, you will not need to wear them." Joker smiled as he reached over and took her glasses off and put them aside.

" Why?" She protested.

" Harley sweets, You can be fake to other people, but when you're with me, your mask is off. I feel lied to if you're not showing your true self." He gently touched her cheek and met with her eyes. He had a point, Harleen thought. She did say that she would try to build a trusting relationship with him. How could he trust her if she hadn't told him about those things? That would make her another lousy doctor. Harleen gazed down and gave a firm nod.

" You're right; from now on, I'll be true." She smiled back softly. Joker released his hand and just stared with a somewhat annoyed face.

" I know I must sound demanding, but your voice." He motioned to her. Harleen chuckled embarrassingly.

"Doan wawhry, from now on yuh get tuh see de true Dr. Harleen Qunizel. Ya' dig?" Joker smiled big in disbelief.

" I can't believe all this time you hid that accent from me. I would have fallen for you sooner." He giggled. Harleen opened her eyes and felt her face's sudden warmness. Before she could speak, Joker got an inch closer. He left no space as he proceeded to get near. Sooner or later, Harleen felt him brush his lips onto her. He then touched her jaw as she grabbed his shoulders. Joker deepened the kiss as she followed back. Harleen could have sworn this had been a dream or was she spacing off. Whatever the situation was, she knew one thing: she didn't want the moment to end.

***

The time at nine o'clock triggered the alarm right next to the bed to go off. Harley groaned and grabbed a pillow to wrap around her ears. Somehow the alarm seemed to get louder and louder by the minute. She angrily scooted towards her nightstand and blindly struggled to snooze the alarm. Harley laid on her bed for a couple of short seconds before the alarm went off again. She groaned in protest and hit the alarm until she finally pressed the snooze button. It took a while before Harley slowly got out of bed. She stretched and headed towards the bathroom.

" Great, anudder dream flashback." She croaked. " Doan know what my trauma is, or what?" Harley said while brushing her teeth and spitting out the toothpaste. Her dreams recently had been random flashbacks of her being a psychiatrist and having a session with Joker. They all started the same and ended the same way. She's sitting in her office preparing all of the paperwork. Then there's a knock at the door. The door opens to reveal Joker and two guards. They leave, and Harleen and Joker talk about something. Where it ends when the two of them kiss, this dream or flashback, in particular, had been the one where it was the first time the two of them kissed. Harley didn't think much about them and thought the best option was to ignore it.

After she was done brushing her teeth, Harley decided to take a quick shower and dress afterward. Dark gray heavy clouds filled the sky with a cool breeze of wind. Harley brought her baseball bat with her as she walked through Gotham. She needed to run an errand before heading to work. Work funny! There had been something more like someone she had to fetch from learning more about how to run a business. Harley skipped her entire way to her local destination.

Half an hour later from dodging the Gotham PD, she finally made it. The place was an old warehouse with other buildings surrounding it. Anyone who would take a glance at the place would just think it was empty. Harley searched to find the door in the back. There was a little mail slit for an opening. She crouched down and lifted the slit to see a few clowns gathered around doing something like playing a game of some sort. Her eyes moved to the other side, and she saw more clowns gathered around. The clowns, a mix between female and male, were huddled together cheering and cussing to where it seemed like a game of darts. Several of the clowns from the other side moved to the bigger group. When they left, there was a short depressed clown with a cigar that caught Harley's eye when he became visible.

" Bingo." She muttered. The clown watched the others play the darts game and wondered if they could replace the target and have him be the one they were shooting at. Before he was almost tempted to ask, he walked to the door instead of joining the chaos. The clown showed barely any reaction when he closed the door to find Harley outside.

" Hiya Archie! You're just de clown I wanted tuh see." Harley waved. Archie took his unlit cigar and placed it in his pocket.

" Miss Quinn. How come you're here?"

" Yuh know about my sandwich shop?" Archie nodded as Harley smiled.

" Yeah, where the boss is helping you, right?"

" Yes, that's de one. Okay? Yeah, so aftuh doin' a little mawh research, I learned dat I need an accountant tuh help wit' all de money and dat-"

" So you want me to join you?" Archie interrupted Harley.

" Yes! So what do yuh say, or what?"

" I don't know." Archie glared.

" Come on, I'll bet it'll be mawh fun wawhkin' wit' me than your bawhin' desk job where I tink it's a right reason tuh end your life. Yuh got me so fahr?" The clown still seemed unsure about Harley's offer.

" Oh. Right? De place is full of knives and fryers, so who knows what deadly accident could happen. Ya' dig?" Harley leaned closer to Archie with her hands on her knees. It didn't take long for him to answer.

" So when do I start?" The short clown perked up.

" In a mattuh of minutes, but do yuh guys have a tv and a karaoke machine by any chance?" Harley asked. Archie drifted off into space with a puzzled expression.

" We do have a few spares that some of the others stole for the boss. I don't know why he needed so many, but I don't think we have a karaoke machine." Harley lit up and smiled.

" Good! Okay? Can yuh go and get me one? I'll wait fawh yuh here and den we'll find ourselves a karaoke machine. Yuh with me?"

" Yes, but what will I say if someone catches me like Frost or the boss?" Harley stook her bottom lip and furrowed her eyebrows for a moment.

" Just tell dem dat uhh. Yuh was ordered tuh relocate it, and if Joker catches yuh say dat yuh are checkin' de TVs fawh any damage. Yuh with me?" Archie had that look of unsureness but shrugged.

" All right." Archie grabbed his cigar from his pocket and placed it in his mouth unlit. He turned back and made his way in the door, thinking about how he didn't have a real plan. Harley observed the depressed clown go in and shoved her hands in her jacket, and waited. Out of the blue, Quinn heard the nearby garage door shift open. It creaked by the second, and it only made it up partially, but it was enough so a car could pass through. She yelped and immediately ran to the other side of the warehouse, trying her best not to be seen with the absence of objects to hide behind. Harley faced back to see a black car coming out of the garage. The car went straight and caught a glimpse of a guy in a black suit and a red tie and a guy in the backseat with green hair. They went in the opposite direction of where the blonde jester had been hiding.

Harley sighed in relief. "Looks like Archie doesn't need that wawhry about Frost and Joker."

***

Ivy sat at a table near the counter, fully dressed with her apron on and her hair tied back in a low ponytail. She had been messing with one of her plant decorations while she waited for the clowns.

" Now look at how beautiful you are. It's sad how humans on this planet can't admire you guys. " Ivy petted the top of the plant with so much glee. She stared at the plant like if she was waiting for it to respond. " Sometimes I wish I had a plant that could talk with. It can get a little lonely in the greenhouse."

" Red, who are yuh tawhkin' to?" Ivy jumped as she stopped petting the plant.

" Jesus Harls! When did you get here!?" Harley, with all smiles, was holding a big box that reached up to her chin. Archie, the clown, had a shopping cart with a flat-screen tv and what looked to be a bottle of vodka with the sticker tag ripped. Harley did her best to see where she was going to show her friend the box.

" Just now. Look what I got I've!" Harley tore off the tape of the box, giggling the whole time. Inside there were sheets of bubble wrap and more tape. The girl gasped and struggled to get the machine out of the box. The machine had a small screen and buttons to play with. On the side, it had the name of the brand " Karaoke Time" in white letters printed on.

" Why did you get a karaoke machine?" Ivy asked as she observed the object. Harley dugout the other accessories such as the song selection book and the microphone, and other cables. She held the microphone close to her lips to respond.

"Becawze aftuh I read de bad reviews online. I thought maybe people wanted mawh entertainment. Ya' dig? People can sin' and watch tv while dey wait. Yuh with me? Plus, Red, how many restaurants do yuh know dat have a karaoke machine, or what? A FUCKING KARAOKE MACHINE!" Harley giggled like a child getting a brand new toy on Christmas morning. Ivy, with the corner of her eye, saw a shopping cart with a tv getting closer. She couldn't see the person moving it, only the legs and clown shoes.

" Who did you bring?" Poison Ivy indicated the cart that got reeled in next to Harley.

" Oh, it's Archie." As soon as he heard his name, the short clown got out of the way so the girls could see him. " I brought him here as our accountant. Ya' dig? I read online dat any type of business needs an accountant. Right? So I thought of Archie here. Since he's de guy, I always go tuh do my taxes. " She smiled.

" You don't do your taxes." He commented.

" Well, if I did, I would go tuh yuh." Ivy glanced at the clown then at the jester.

" Wouldn't you need more than one person so they could check on each other?" Ivy rose to her feet and grasped the pot plant. Harley placed the microphone down on the white table and pouted.

" Maybe. I doan know anyone else wit' accountin' experience. Yuh with me? And I kind of got distracted wit' de reviews and fanficshun fawh me tuh do any research. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley pressed her lips together and proceeded to grab the bottle off the shopping cart.

" You read fanfiction?" Both Ivy and Archie asked in unison.

" Well, when I was readin' de reviews, one of dem menshuned dat de whole idea of Harley Quinn ownin' a sandwich shop sounded like a weird-ass fanficshun. So den I wondered if dere was any fanficshun of me, or what?" Harley paused and giggled more like a teenage girl ready to spill the tea to her friends.

"So I found dis website called Ao4, and I typed in de search bar my name tuh see ovuh 4000 wawhks! I stopped and had a little celebrashun dance. Anyway, I spent my time readin' through different ones. Right? I surprisingly found an authawh I liked named Emporiathesawhceress. Okay? Den I latuh read through mawh, and den found out by de comments dat dis LoyalRushCrew person is like friends wit' Emporia. Den dere's dis toid person Shabecca who's also like a friend where like all of deir comments is just dem copy and pastin' lines from de stawhy and givin' deir reacshuns. Yuh with me? Nuttin' wrong wit' dat." The girl spoke rapidly that her speech had been almost incomprehensible. Harley released a deep breath and grabbed the bottle with both of her hands.

" Okay then. That was something. Where did you get that bottle of Vodka?" Ivy gestured at the bottle that looked like it had been opened and resealed.

" Some guy gave her that off the street after injuring the cop that was after him." Archie was the one who replied. Ivy furrowed her eyebrows and looked at Harley. Like if the blonde read the redhead's mind, she answered Ivy's question.

" I hurt de man becawze he called me a dumb bimbo blonde. So broke his nose and knee caps where it turned out dat de cop always bugged him. Right? Den he gave me dis as a thank yuh gift. Okay?" Ivy reached for the bottle that Harley let her have. She spun the bottle in a 360 motion and took the time to notice every detail. The tap came off easily with no effort. Ivy placed the bottle inches away from her nose and expressed an unpleasant facial expression.

" I don't know what the hell that is, but it's not Vodka. It smells like a mix between death and vinegar." Ivy almost gagged once the dreadful aroma hit her nostrils. She put the broken tap back on and set it aside.

" Can I drink it?" Archie's dead fish eyes lit up once the word death got mentioned, hoping it would be his ticket to see the light.

The sound of the back door opening startled the three of them. Laughing followed after the door slam. Joker took off his typical purple jacket to hang on the coat rack and headed to the apron one. He walked towards the eating area where the other employees were as he fixed on his apron.

" Woah, why is Archie here?" The depressed clown caught Joker's eye once he entered the room. Archie met his boss's psychotic blue eyes but didn't choose to speak one word.

" Archie is here tuh wawhk in our finance department. Yuh with me? I thought he would be great fawh de job." Harley answered.

" A little heads up would have been nice." Joker glared at the clown as Archie and Harley shrugged their shoulders. The flat screen tv in the cart had a red sticker on the side. With big, bold white letters reading " Property of Harley Quinn." Joker took note that the sticker seemed to look like it was placed on top of another sticker. He slowly got closer to get a better view since he could have sworn that part of the previous sticker stood out. Before he could get a better view, Harley quickly moved the shopping cart out of his way.

"Okay, guys! Okay? Let's get dis set up and get ready tuh wawhk!" Harley grinned widely and threw her arm in the air.

***

" _Not paralyzed, but I seem to be struck by you. I want to make you move because you're standing still. If your body matches what your eyes can do. You'll probably move right through me on my way to you."_

Joker swayed his torso to the beat of the song playing as he sang into the microphone. He danced all around the dining room as quite a few customers were either sitting waiting for their order, eating, or waiting for Joker to take their order.

" I can't believe dat Carol chick left a bad review. She din't die. She just chose tuh get hurt. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley muttered under her breath while fixing up a veggie sandwich and then cutting it in half.

" Well, what do you expect?" Ivy answered even though Harley wasn't necessarily talking to her.

" De ting is though, dat de majawhity of dem say de service is bad, but de food is good. Right? So we just have tuh improve de service. " She placed the sandwich on a checkerboard patterned paper on the tray with the soda beverage. She transferred the tray to the counter and tapped the bell.

The karaoke machine had been a hit well with Joker, who was the only one using it. Shortly after the song finished, Joker standing in the middle of the sitting area, bowed as if anyone was paying attention. He frowned once he went back up and glared at the customers.

" Clap! Clap! Everyone clap!" No one reacted instantly but shortly followed the clown's orders when they saw him give an unsettling glare. Sooner or later, everyone clapped, and some even whistled as Joker smiled and bowed once more. " Thank you! Thank you! You all are too kind. Now onto the next one!" The bell rang once more, but Joker decided to ignore it and went to pick another song. He flipped through the songbook and chose a song quickly. The bell chimed once more as Joker turned the volume knob. He started to sway his hips once the song kicked in and danced further from the counter.

" _You didn't have to look my way. Your eyes still haunt me to this day, but you did. Yes, you did_. " Joker danced his way to a table where only one guy was having a party for one. He looked fairly young and dressed like he was on a date. But by the looks of it, it seemed that he was stood up as he expressed disappointment. Joker got close to him and held the mic inches away from the guy's lips. The guy did his best to back away, but somehow the chair refused to follow.

" Here you go, sing the next set of lyrics." Joker grinned. The dude sat there awkwardly and shifted his head to the side. " Go on." Joker moved the mic closer and didn't allow the guy to find a way out of the situation.

" I don't know the song." The guy finally confessed. This received an overdramatic gasp and eye-widening from Joker.

" How can you not know this song?! What song do you know? Brass Goggles, Fancy Shoes, WAP, uhh Rhinestone eyes-" Just about before Joker could continue naming song titles, the bell rang once and rang several times after with a fed-up Harley.

" JOKER! GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE AND TAKE DIS TUH TABLE FOUR!" Harley narrowed her eyes and had the face of getting ready to turn things into madness. Joker sighed and groaned as he whined back.

" Ugh. I'll do it after this song." Harley furrowed her eyebrows even more.

" MR. JOKER! COME HERE DIS INSTANT! I DIN'T GET DE KARAOKE MACHINE JUST FAWH YUH!" Joker growled at the word MR. He dropped the microphone on the guy's table and walked towards the counter to finally serve the food. The front door opened to see a semi-skinny guy in a green suit with black question marks printed all over it. He also had a green bowler hat on, and he was carrying a tray of perfume bottles with half of them having a dark shade of green and the other having a lighter shade. Right after him, there was a tall, muscular man with tubes connected on him, and his face was hidden behind a mask.

" Guess who's back. Back again. BANE'S back, tell a friend!" Bane looked around the restaurant. " Well, actually, this is my first time. Damn it; I should have said that when I came back. Oh well." Bane muttered and took a seat next to Riddler even though they didn't come together. The Riddler put down his tray and grabbed strips he cut out and sprayed it with the perfume.

" What you got there?" Bane asked as he grabbed a light green bottle.

" Oh, it's my new cologne and perfume collection. Ever since Harley started her sandwich business, I thought about selling something too." Riddler finished spraying his samples from both fragrances. " I wanted to make my line of jewelry, and I had the perfect name for it too. Riddle's Jewelry. But it turns out there is already a place with that name." Riddler groaned. He grabbed a couple of samples and went to a random group of people sitting at a nearby booth. The people didn't seem to get startled by Riddler's sudden appearance.

" Hello! Are any of you interested in the ' Riddle Me This' line of Cologne and perfume?" Eddie dropped the samples on the table as some of the customers went to grab them to smell. He received several happy faces from the customers.

" Eddie! Leave the customers alone! This isn't some swap meet!" Joker called out from a table near him, giving the people their food. Riddler tsked and angrily turned back.

" Don't tell me what to do, you clown!" The Riddler turned back to the group of customers where he was pitching his fragrance. Joker stuck his tongue out and cussed under his breath. He noticed the tray of fragrance was left abandoned as Bane was nowhere to be found. Joker stood there, staring at the empty table. After a minute of pondering, Joker grinned like the grinch and began to chuckle menacingly. He then reached for his pocket and felt a small metal tube. It's a good thing he loaded himself with some Joker gas in case he found something funny. He glanced back at Riddler to see he was still talking as Joker crept closer to the tray. He reached for one at random and placed it on his person. The Clown Prince looked in all directions, and everyone seemed busy with what they were doing. So he rapidly moved and went straight to the bathroom.

Once he entered, Joker took out the cologne and squeezed the cap open. The cap opened easily, and he poured the liquid into the sink. After rinsing it, he grasped his tube and placed the opening of the tube into the bottle. He made sure it was tight so none of the gas could slip out. Joker released another chuckle as he saw the green gas resembling the cologne fill the space. Now the real trick is to close it without any gas coming out. Slow and steady, he removed the tube and quickly grabbed the cap, and twisted it shut.

Joker came out of the bathroom with the cologne hiding between his apron. Just about he was going back to Riddler's table, Bane reappeared from wherever he was and had been sitting at the table. Joker continued walking towards the table, thinking about his plan.

" Bane! Have you ever seen a street dog with three legs?" Bane somehow made the impression of confusion behind his mask.

" Uhh. I don't think so." Bane answered.

" You're in luck. There's one outside. Look." Bane shifted his view to the window next to the door. There was a German Shepherd with three legs right across the street. Joker took his chance and pulled out the bottle and placed it on the tray.

" I can cross that off my bucket list." Bane turned back around. " So can I order now?" He asked as he adjusted himself on the chair, which looked like a stool compared to his size.

" Sure, what the hell. What do you want?" Joker took out his notebook and pen. Riddler came back from the booth to grab a cologne. Joker managed to place the one he messed with on the side and in front of the others. He closely followed Riddler's hand to which direction it headed and saw that he chose the gas one. Joker smiled and watched Eddie leave with the bottle. Oh, this is going to be great, Joker thought.

Riddler made it to the same booth and showed his creation. " Isn't great. Look, you can wear some right now!" He pressed down the snuffer cap on a guy near him. Green gas lured out and gradually evaporated in the air. Nothing happened at first, but as soon as the gas took effect, the guy started to laugh. The laughter increased in volume as his smile became bigger and bigger. The other people around him were filled with fear. Riddler looked at the cologne then at the guy. He narrowed his eyes and grunted. The guy's eyes became more expansive and pure white where it followed by vomiting. Riddler slammed the bottle onto the ground where the weak glass shattered.

" Damn it, Joker!" He yelled out. Joker laughed even more when the bottle broke where the gas slowly spread throughout. The other customers felt the gas hit and eventually fell for the trap. Where the whole booth and some of the other booths right behind them were all laughing. With their faces all distorted and their eyes all going cold pure white.

" Joker! What de hell?!" Harley shouted out from the kitchen once she heard the sounds of uncontrollable laughter.

Joker giggled as a child replied. " Don't worry, Harley! It's the nondeadly one. I think." Harley just groaned.

***

" Great meal. De waituh had great singin' skills.De food was delicious, and de waituh should be on De Voice as a judge." Harley read aloud some of the recent reviews from the Joker incident a few days ago. Surprisingly there were more positive reviews than bad ones.

" Well, doan know how dat was possible, but we did it." Harley smiled and closed the laptop. There were still a couple of minutes before opening time, so the group had been hanging out in the dining area. Harley and Ivy were sitting at a table, and Joker had been lounging at one of the booths.

" I can't believe people come here." Ivy yawned.

" Ooo! Okay? What if we become one of de top food places in Gotham City. Ya' dig?" Harley cheered as she rose from her seat and dashed to the door to change the sign.

" Highly doubt that," Ivy mumbled, still looking tired.

***

Things started to kick in once hour two began. The place was fuller than the previous days as almost the tables were full. Everything seemed to go according to plan until a small group of six entered, with all of them wearing shades of green. All of them had a picket sign reading similar things like 'save the animals' or 'eating animals is wrong.' The leader of the group, who was male and the tallest, spoke out loud to the customers.

" Every single one of you. Stop right there." A few of the people followed the guy's orders while others continued minding their business." I want to let all of you know that any of you eating meat will burn in hell. We don't believe in animal abuse. Animals are our friends, what did they ever do to you? We humans should not eat our friends. This is why you should all eat pure fresh vegetables." The guy's group all cheered in unison and held their signs inches higher.

From the kitchen, Ivy scowled at the group with all of her might and gripped her fists so tight that her knuckles almost bleed. " Vegetarians." She muttered with disgust.

" Vegetables are the best things that could happen to us, fellow humans. They are delicious, healthy, and it saves animals from getting harmed. So which is why we should stop eating meat and start and enjoy the Vegetarian lifestyle." The guy grinned, showing all of his yellow teeth.

Harley knew she had to go something before Ivy would go insane. She turned to her side to talk to Ivy, but she was already out of the kitchen.

Ivy skimmed around to make sure she had enough plants in case things went south.

" Why are you here?" Ivy did her best to be calm, but her tone had a hint of threat.

" Didn't you hear Don? We are here to spread our message. I bet that's what the Vegan Teacher wants." One of the females spoke out from the group that Ivy didn't bother to look at.

" Ugh, that bitch. Look, all of you must leave or else." No one in the group felt a sense of fear or threat; they all smirked among themselves. Since no one moved, Ivy walked closer to Don, not leaving any space, and released dust like if she was blowing a kiss. The pollen blew straight to his face and was absorbed instantly.

" I said, you all must go," Ivy whispered in his ear with a mix of threat and a tiny bit of seduction. The guy nodded vigorously and turned to his group.

" We must go!" Don ordered, but none of his group members believed his demands and just stood there.

" That wasn't part of the plan!" Another girl called out. Ivy's frustration grew by the second as there was no other way that these people would leave.

" You filthy humans should know better! How dare you eat plants that mother earth has provided you, ha! You, creatures, are no better! You destroy the environment…" Ivy's eyes glowed in anger. She raised her arms as the plants from all of the sides of the shop grew in length. Some of the other customers screamed as they got up and attempted to get out of the way. " You pollute the water and the sky. You pieces of shit think you're helping the environment, but in reality, you're destroying it day by day." The plants increased in size as each one tangled one of the group members and squeezed them tight. The grip became stronger each time they struggled and resisted. One of the plants broke through the entrance as Ivy moved forward, controlling the plants with her.

One by one, the redhead made each member fly in the air by making the plants increase in height and throwing them. Some of them got flung further than others as some of them fell and slammed against the cement or a building. Leaving them with several broken bones.

***

" Food was fantastic. Would recommend just doan piss off de green chick." Harley giggled at the last part. It had been an hour since closing time as Harley read some new reviews. And all four of them had been sitting at a booth.

" Oh, babe, I need to tell you something." Ivy nervously smiled and pulled some of her hairs out of the way. Harley raised an eyebrow, wondering.

" I possibly wrote some good reviews to make up for my incident." Ivy sighed, embarrassed.

" Oh Red! That's so sweet of yuh. I knew some of dem din't make sense." Harley closed her laptop and slid off the seat.

" Hey, I also wrote positive reviews. I mostly made my henchmen do it, but I thought of it first." Joker added on trying to one-up Ivy. All that Harley could do was giggle.

" Aww. Thank yuh, guys. And fawh dat-" she headed towards the kitchen and came out with the bottle she got days ago. " Let's celebrate with a drink!" She opened her mouth widely in a smile.

" There's no way I'm drinking that, and neither should you," Ivy remarked and left the booth. " I loved to stay, but I need to check on plants." She stretched her arms and pulled the hair tie making her hair free. The apron was next as she reached back to untie her knot. Harley pouted, but she understands that her friend has her needs too.

" Well good night Red! See ya!" Ivy removed her apron and gave a soft smile. She left for the kitchen and placed her apron on the hanger, then the back door opened and closed. Harley yawned and reached for the bottle, and went back to the booth.

" So do yuh guys wanna drink?" She asked as she opened the cap and wrinkled her nose. She gagged a little once the aroma hit her nostrils.

" I would, but I think I need to drink the whole thing to see if it would kill me. Plus, I think I need to get going. Frost told me to help him with something." Archie remarked as the short clown slid off the seat and walked to the front door.

" See you later, Archie!" Both Joker and Harley yelled out and waved, smiling. Archie waved back lazily and headed out. Finally, the shop was empty, only leaving Joker and Harley. The two of them didn't choose to speak one word as both of them awkwardly glancing in different directions.

"So do yuh wanna drink, or what?" Harley shyly spoke. Joker observed the bottle then glanced at Harley, who seemed to be shy all of a sudden.

" Sure, why not." Joker shrugged.

***

Drink after drink, the sketchy bottle was almost empty. They used small paper cups from the kitchen to drink. Joker and Harley moved from the booth to the kitchen with their backs to the counter, laughing. Both of them were out of their aprons. Joker's hair was slicked back but still being a little messy.

" Then poor Batsy… left. I was like… hey, girly. Take… your boy tuh Wisconsin with you. " Joker snickered as his speech converted into nonsense.

" Oh. What...did Batsy do?" Harley slurred. She leaned closer to Joker as her balance failed. Harley bumped into Joker and caught her as his balance also began to fail. They both giggled like little children. Harley grasped his broad shoulders and grinned widely at him. Joker ducked down to her and placed his nose onto hers. They giggled softly before Harley closed her eyes shut and placed her lips onto his. It was a little brush until she fully went in and deepened the kiss. Joker didn't do anything to stop it, so he tugged her closer and returned the kiss. He grabbed her shoulders into an embrace and moved her to lean on the counter. Harley tugged at his shoulders a little tighter, still lost in the kiss.

Minutes passed by until both of them broke away for air. They released small, steady pants as Harley surprised Joker by pushing him enough so she could get on her knees. She ran her fingers up and his long legs. The girl stopped and went to his zipper. Her fingers refused to cope with her as she tried to pull the zipper down. Harley smiled as she finally got the zipper down and unbuttoned his pants. She pulled his pants with his green and purple striped boxers down, revealing his semi-hard erection. Joker gasped at the sudden breeze hitting him down there.

Harley grasped him with so much force that Joker groaned. She slowly stroke him from the base up to the tip. Taking her time, Joker grabbed at her shoulders and groaned. She removed her hand and replaced it with her mouth. She bobbed her slowly at the start but then increased her speed. Joker groaned louder as soon as she changed her speed. The girl sucked from the base, almost touching his pale skin with her nose.

Midnight rose, but the clown and the jester were so caught up with each other that time was the last thing on their minds.


	5. The Critic

Dominic Rain, a forty-year-old man, sat in his home office in the late evening. He was average weight, had thick black hair that always looks greasy. The man wore a tight white dress shirt with black suspenders and dress shoes. He skimmed through a list of restaurants on the computer, searching for the right one. To help pay bills, his job was to write a journal page reviewing the restaurant and, most importantly, the food. From all the years of being a food critic, Dominic has never eaten horrible food, and he had been getting pretty bored with writing positive reviews. For once, he wants to write a bad review to spice things up. Rain had been thinking just to write a bad review just for the hell of it.

Dominic searched through different pages looking for one that caught his eye. Until he found two, it was either between a restaurant that served breakfast food 24/7 named ' Break your Fast' or a new sandwich shop that replaced ' All You Need is Subs.' Dominic had gone to the sandwich shop before when the Romano Family owned it. He felt a bit of disappointment when they closed down since he could have sworn that they made one of the best sandwiches he has ever eaten. So he then clicked on the H.Quinn's Subs page as he noticed that the shop had a 3.7-star review with an equal mix of positive and negative reviews from previous customers.

***

Harley wore her classic jester outfit minus the hat. She groaned as she walked unhurriedly on the street. The night before had been a blur, following Harley's painful morning. She had a throbbing headache, she threw up a couple of times, her jaw and cheeks were sore for some reason, and she forgot to do laundry. Maybe Ivy was right about drinking out of the bottle of liquid was a bad idea.

Harley finally reached the sandwich shop and struggled and tumbled her way to the front door. The sound of the bell made her hiss as it triggered her headache more. Ivy stood in the middle of the dining area dressed in her apron. Her wavy hair had been loose as she had her arms crossed. Harley looked up at her friend, sensing her being not happy.

Harley waved and smiled, feeling unsure. " Hiya Red!" Ivy didn't respond, but her facial expression said it all. Harley released a small hopeless laugh. Oh, what did she do that pissed off Ivy?

" You drank it, didn't you?" Ivy uncrossed her arms and walked towards her friend.

Quinn had no idea what to say to get out of the situation. " Drank what?"

" Don't play dumb. Just admit that you drank that death Vodka last night. While I told you not to." Ivy scolded. Before Harley could speak, she felt a small amount of burning liquid rise up in her throat. She covered her mouth and ran back outside. Ivy frowned and shook her head once she heard the faint sound of vomiting. Moments later, the front door reopened as Harley came back with her hand on her head.

" How d'ya find out, or what?" Harley entered further into the shop and decided to pull out a chair from a table nearby. She rested her head on the smooth white table as she groaned.

" When I got here. I saw the back door completely open, then I went inside and found the bottle empty. Then guess what, the keys to the shop were on the floor. So I left to check the front door, and it was unlocked." Ivy looked down at Harley, where she had her head on the side.

" Accidents nevuh happen in a perfect world," Harley added.

Ivy sighed, pulled out a small clear orange bottle, and placed it next to Harley's head. " Here, drink two of these. I'll be right back. I forgot to do something at the greenhouse." The redhead left the shop as a door from the back opened.  
Harley removed her head from the table and snatched the pill bottle as she heard footsteps coming.

She gave a puzzled complexion while the footsteps started to get near. Archie, in his usual clown costume, entered the room. He stopped and took note of Harley's facial and physical appearance.

" You're hungover too." Harley twisted the bottle cap and spilled the pills to grab two, and put the rest back.

" Too?" She raised an eyebrow. Archie stepped closer.

" Yeah, the boss is hungover also." He answered. Harley's raised her eyebrows even higher. How can she not remember?

" What! Okay?? Ugh, whatevuh we drank jacked me up. Yuh got me so fahr? I doan even know how I got home. Yuh got me so fahr? Do you have any idea what happened last night, or what?" Archie stared off into the distance, trying to remember the previous events that occurred the night before.

" Well, around one, Frost got a call from the boss. Frost began to worry since the boss was speaking gibberish. It was challenging to understand what he was saying, but somehow we found him, and he was near a rundown apartment complex." Archie said as he took out an unlit cigar from his pocket and placed it in his mouth.

" Just great. I wish I could remembuh what happened here. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley got up and lazily walked to the kitchen.

" If you want to know more, just look at the security cameras," Archie commented. Harley froze halfway as she turned around to meet the short clown.

" We have security cameras?" Archie nodded as he pointed up to the ceiling. Harley lifted her head and saw in the corner that there was a small black camera attached. She then found another on the other side of the shop.

" Show me."

***

Harley and Archie were in a tiny room in the back next to the storage room. The room had three computer monitors on a wooden desk. Once Archie got involved, he decided to take the room as his office. One computer was turned on as the clown was searching for yesterday's time. Archie finally found the video from the time the shop had been empty besides Joker and Harley.

Harley leaned forward a bit to focus on the computer screen. So far, nothing bad had happened as it only showed Joker and Harley talking to each other and drinking. Archie fast forward a bit but showed the same thing, so he moved it again. He stopped when Joker and Harley changed locations. Harley frowned as the camera didn't pick them up in the kitchen. So Archie took the time to change the cameras and found the one in the kitchen. He clicked play once he found the time stamp. Harley watched with her tense light blue eyes not leaving the screen. The same thing happened. Harley was about to tell Archie to turn it off before her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. On the video, it showed Harley going in and kissing Joker with so much force. Before she could think how things could get worse, it then showed Harley getting on her knees and pulling down Joker's pants.

" Oh my GOD!" Harley placed her hands on her mouth as she couldn't believe what she just saw. No wonder her jaw felt sore as soon as she woke up. " Delete dis!" The blonde reached for the mouse and clicked at random.

" Uh. You just downloaded it."

" I did!? Oh my god! By any means, promise me yuh won't show dis tuh Red. Ya' dig? I doan know what she'll do if she sees dis. " Harley whined and panicked simultaneously.

The front door slammed opened with the bell ringing frantically as a loud groan followed.

" Oh shut up! Ugh. Why the hell did I come in the front?" Joker groaned even more as he strolled towards the kitchen. "Maybe getting shitfaced last night was not a good idea." He wore a light green dress shirt with a yellow vest. With purple and thin black stripes dress pants and black with white spats dress shoes. Joker went straight to the apron hanger and grabbed his spring to wear.

Harley rushed out of Archie's office with her head still painfully throbbing. Her speed stopped once she saw Joker facing the wall as he was fixing a knot.

 _" I don't think kissing and sucking is a thing that coworkers do._ " Harley glared as she lightly pulled on her high pigtails.

" Not now Harleen. Plus, I was drunk." She whispered under her breath.

" _You should never blame the alcohol. You know when you're under the influence, that's when you most likely say and do things that you are less likely to do when you're sober."_ Harley blocked out the chance of receiving a lecture from herself.

Joker finished his knot and turned to see a nervous Harley.

" Hey, do yuh remembuh what happened last Friday night, or what? I mean, last night. Yuh got me so fahr?" She popped the pills into her mouth and went searching for water in the kitchen.

" The last thing I could remember was you asking me to drink. I remembered we talked until everything went vague. So no." Joker furrowed his eyebrows. What kind of drink was that? He couldn't think of any alcohol that made him forget that much.

" Thank God." Harley found a water bottle in the refrigerator and took a big gulp. Joker raised a green eyebrow at her response.

Harley began to panic once she saw his cute confused look on his face. " I mean. Thank God I wasn't de only one who forgot. Okay? Doan yuh know how embarrassin' dat is, or what?" She cringed and agreed on leaving the room. Joker raised his eyebrows even higher. What was this girl hiding, he thought to himself?

***

Two hours later, the shop had a decent amount of customers. Lately, a couple of felons have been showing up where they let a mix of normal Gothamites and the crazy ones. Surprisingly there hadn't been any mishaps or injuries from either the criminals or Joker.

The doorbell chimed to reveal a group of three: two guys and one girl. There was a tall guy with black hair and glasses dressed in a blue t-shirt and jeans. He went by the name of Nick. Then there was a shorter guy or kid who also had black hair. He wore a red turtleneck and black jeans. Who went by Dim. Then finally there was the girl who had orange hair with a blue beanie. She wore a yellow flower dress and went by Wonda. The three of them agreed on sandwiches after a long day of work. They planned to go to Subway, but neither of them wanted to wait that long.

The three of them stood by the sign that stated if they wanted to dine in, they had to wait, but if they wanted to take out, they could go straight to the counter. It took minutes before the waiter decided to attend them.

" Uh, what is it? A party of three?" Joker yawned. The three were shocked to see who their waiter was but didn't say anything. Nick nodded as Joker grabbed a pile of menus and signaled to follow. Joker took them to a table by a window and dropped the menus. The group of three settled down, and each yanked the booklets.

" Okay. Holler or raise your hands when you're ready. Did I make it clear, darlings?" He didn't give the group a chance to answer as he turned and left towards the counter.

" Is that The Joker?" Wonda asked the two boys.

" That makes more sense from the name of this place. So do you think Harley Quinn is the owner?" Nick said as he took a peek at the counter.

" Do you guys think Batman knows?" Dim questioned as he was quite surprised by the number of options the shop offered.

Joker leaned against the display counter, eyeing the dining room. He wasn't still at 100 percent as he felt a bit exhausted. Even though he didn't show any real expression on his face, many of the customers somehow felt a certain level of uneasiness and shivered by the sight of him.

" It's been a while since I've seen you wear that," Joker commented. Harley was cutting some meat but heard from a short distance.

" Yeah, it's been a long time." Harley grinned. She moved the meat to the stove, where she walked across the room as Joker followed.

" Why did you decide to wear it today?" Joker faced her and leaned forward. Placing his elbows on top of the display counter.

"Oh, it was de only ting dat was clean." She lightly giggled. Harley wasn't lying.

" Well, it's truly a classic." Joker smiled. Harley felt her smile get wider as a hint of warmness filled her cheeks. For no real reason, she thought.

Ivy entered the kitchen to notice Harley behaving like a teenage girl who was madly in love with the guy she was talking to. She did her best to ignore them and went to do her job duties.

The front door opened to have a guy with greasy black hair and wearing a white dress shirt. He had an orange tie with black suspenders and charcoal dress pants. The guy had a small spiral notebook and a black ballpoint pen in his hand. Across the room, Harley saw him from the corner of her eye.

" Fuck me." She whined. Joker's blue eyes perked up, as so his green eyebrows.

" I don't think right now is a good time Harley." He teased. Harley's cheeks became redder and warmer.

" What no. I mean, dat guy is de food critic. I read online dat his next stop was dis place, but I din't know dat he was comin' today. Ya' dig?" She muttered as she pointed towards the front. Joker turned back, and Ivy stepped closer to the counter.

" That guy is the food critic? He looks like he should be working for the bank. Like a douchey bank teller." Joker commented.

Harley took in a big amount of air. Out of all days, why did he choose to come this day? " So go sit him, I guess." Harley motioned with a metal spatula to the critic's direction. Joker obliged and marched towards the front of the shop.

" So you and Joker," Ivy spoke without looking at Harley once Joker was out of the picture.

" What about him?" Harley relocated from the stove to the preparing station. Ivy walked with her.

" It's evident that you still like him." Harley stopped her sandwich-making process and joined with her friend's conversation.

" What are yuh tawhkin' about?" Quinn asked, puzzled.

" Really? Besides the yelling. I see the ways you act around him. The way you act all nervous. The way your eyes perk up every time he enters the room. Then your voice becomes even higher than before. " Ivy claimed as Harley cocked an eyebrow.

" I don't act like that!" She stuck her red bottom lip out.

" Harl! Come on!" Ivy raised her tone in a higher pitch to make an example. " Oh, Joker. You're so funny. Please take this to table three pretty please with a cherry on top. Oh my god! Just kiss me already. Ya' dig. Haha!" Ivy even twisted her hair for more emphasis. Harley scowled right back at Ivy's terrible impression of her.

" I din't say any of dat! Okay? Yuh din't even try tuh sound like me." Harley stuck her tongue out in annoyance.

" I might have exaggerated, but still, you said he broke up with you, and I don't want you to fall in love and then get broken once again." Ivy proceeded to grab Harley by her shoulders and went in closer, only leaving a couple of inches of distance. " Just be careful."

" I promise yuh I will. Okay?" Harley smiled and surprised Ivy by embracing her. Ivy went in and deepened the hug.

" Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" A group of male criminals cheered from a nearby booth.

The girls broke apart from their hug and barked back in unison. " Fuck off!" They ignored the obnoxious cheering and went back to do their jobs.

" I think this is the first time I've seen two pretty best friends. Always one of them gotta be ugly." One of the felons spoke to his friends.

***

Dominic gagged immediately at the decor of the restaurant. He loathed the circus and carnivals. It always brought back bad memories from his childhood. All of those clowns and elephants haunted his nightmares, more likely since his stepfather was a clown. And he despised his stepfather; he was glad on the day he died when the guy got hit by a purple and green colored car. Dominic was so distracted by the decor that he didn't hear Joker speaking to him.

" Hello! Hello STRANGER!" Joker waved his gloved hand across Dominic's face. Dominic blinked quickly as his attention from the decor and switched to the clown.

" Okay, are you dining in or taking out?" Joker tried to give him his best smile.

" Dining in." Rain replied as he gave the clown a once over. As he was trying to figure out if he was the real Joker or not. Plus, why on earth would The Joker work at some sandwich shop? Rain then felt a hand grab him by the shoulder. Joker put his arm around Dominic as he guided him to a table.

" Good choice. That reminds me of a joke. What do you call a food wrestling duo?" Dominic didn't say anything as Joker took it as a what.

" The Food Fighters." Joker giggled quietly and pulled out a chair to then push the food critic to the seat. Joker frowned when he saw no reaction from Dominic. " Nothing. I do suppose that one was a bit weak. How about uhh. It was parent-teacher conferences day. The mother of the child said she was going to the meeting. The child then frowned and told her that he wanted his dad to go because every single time his dad came home late, his grades go up the next day." Dominic stared at Joker with no reaction on his face. Almost like if he was disgusted.

" Really nothing. Not a single chuckle. Or at least fake it. " Joker already started to dislike the guy with no sense of humor. Rain started right back and still didn't choose to open his mouth. " Fine, just look over the menu." Joker's tone changed suddenly from cheerful to annoyed.

" You never gave me a menu," Dominic remarked, as he began to open his notebook and write in it.

" Oh, my bad. I guess I was distracted by giving you free entertainment. Free, I said." Joker crossed his arms and pouted his lips.

" So can I get one?"

" I don't know. Can you?" Joker turned around with sass and went to a random table to grab a menu ( from a table he still hadn't taken their orders yet) and threw it at the food critic. Dominic flinched once the menu hit the table and slowly received it.

" Call me over when you're ready, and I'll go if I feel like it." Joker was about to leave until he heard a guy call his name close by. He twirled back around and followed the mysterious voice. Joker made a stop by the table where Nick, Dim, and Wonda sat.

" Yes, my dears." Nick, who Joker guessed was the leader, spoke back.

" We're ready to order." He said. So Joker proceeded to grasp all of the menus and put them around his arms while he took out his notebook and pen.

" Do you guys want to hear a joke?" The three at the table exchanged looks at each other before peeking back at Joker.

" Why did the Queen of Hearts yell ' Off with your head!' At everybody at the dance party?" The group expressed confused facial expressions. " Because she was jealous that she couldn't dance till she was dead. So she would rather see their heads roll. " Out of the three, Dim was the one who released a small hint of laughter. Joker frowned and spaced off in thought.

" Man, what is wrong with me today? I'm really off my game. I know I can come up with better ones." Joker sighed and went back to do his job.

***

Minutes passed by as Harley waited eagerly in the kitchen. She finished all of her pending orders and stood there observing the critic at his table skimming through the menu. She saw every page he flipped and read over as every page the guy turned, and he would stop and write something down. Harley could have sworn that he had read through every page at least more than once. Until finally, the critic closed the menu and pushed it aside. Her eyes went directly to Joker, where he was across the room. He sat in the chair at a table where he was sitting with a couple. Joker hadn't been paying attention to them as his main focus was on the TV above them. Harley's eyes went back to the critic who seemed to be watching Joker wanting him to turn around.

" Joker! Joker! JOKER!" Harley called out; luckily, she didn't need to call him again as he responded but still watching the tv.

" Give me a minute! I want to see the part when Reese Witherspoon tells Emmet that the guy is gay. Then he has to prove it." Harley looked back at Dominic to see him growing impatient as he tapped furiously on the table while glaring at Joker. Harley wanted to yell back at Joker but fought against that, so she reached for the tv remote where it was right next to the cash register and tip jar. She grabbed it and pressed the off button.

Joker frowned once he saw his reflection on the flat screen tv. " Come on, Harley! I'm missing one of the best parts!" He shouted out.

" I'll turn it back on once yuh go and take de guy's orduh." Joker groaned as he got out of his chair and headed towards Dominic's table.

" What can I get you?" Joker asked without any hint of excitement.

***

A week later, Harley and the other three were in the dining area where Harley had her laptop out and was the only one sitting. They finished their work shift, and we're currently searching for Dominic Rain's journal page online. Once Harley found it, she began to read it out loud.

" De bread tasted raw and unbaked. De chef messed up my orduh and gave me turkey instead of ham. De bacon was overcooked and almost looked charred. De service was terrible. If yuh wanna hear some bad jokes, den dis is de place fawh yuh. Since dat is what they're better at doin' than makin' food." Her big smile shifted into a frown from reading part of the journal page. There was more to the article, but Harley didn't feel up to read the rest. The room fell silent while everyone thought about the bad review.

" You know, I bet that douche did that on purpose. He wrote a bad review on a sandwich he ordered that way." Joker broke the silence as his frustration rose again.

" Yeah. Who the hell orders an untoasted sandwich with burnt bacon, day-old turkey, almost moldy cheese, and relish and expect it to be good." Ivy added on as she too started to dislike the guy.

" I don't even think he ate it. Plus, how dare he insult my jokes. I know they weren't that great, but I didn't want to be reminded." Joker narrowed his eyes and evacuated to the back of the kitchen.

" Do you guys think if I ate the sandwich, I might have a chance of dying from food poisoning?" Archie commented with some chance of hope.

" I don't know," Ivy replied. " That seems about right," Archie muttered under his breath and left for the bathroom.

" Dis guy is racist. Ya' dig? All de othuh restaurants he went tuh, he gave dem positive reviews. Okay? I'manna goes all Martin Luthuh Kin' Jr up in here and demands respect. Right?" Harley closed her laptop and rose to her feet.

" Martin Luther King had a dream about equality because he was discriminated against. I don't think getting a negative review from a food critic who had never written a bad review is exactly on the same level." Ivy added on. She did agree with Joker in this one. The food critic overall seemed suspicious.

Joker went outside the shop with the restaurant's home phone in his ear. He leaned against the brick wall with a cigarette in his hand." Frost darling. Can you do me a favor? Okay good. Can you find me all the dirt on the food critic Dominic Rain?"

***

Rain sat in his work office, viewing his last journal page. He smiled right at it. Finally, something different, he thought. Dominic was satisfied with his plan in purposely writing a bad review. Hopefully, the readers would think so too. He also noticed that some of his fellow readers were all tired of reading positive journal pages, and we're all waiting on the day he'll write a negative one. And that day finally hit a home run. Dominic continued to reread his work for the tenth time but was interrupted by a sudden knock at his door. He turned his head to face the door but didn't get up and check who it was.

Another knock ( louder this time) appeared at the door. This time Rain slowly got out of his chair and faced his door, still not moving. An even louder knock followed, but this time he heard a high pitch voice where it sounded like a guy speaking in a girly tone.

" Are you in there, Mr. Rain? I'm new here, and I wanted to if you're done so I can start cleaning." Dominic knew that if he didn't answer the door, the person outside wouldn't leave. He took small steps in the direction of the door. His heart began to beat rapidly while he reached for the doorknob. Sweat ran down his cheeks, and he twisted the doorknob. Once he opened the door, he saw The Joker wearing his usual outfit with a smile printed on his face. Joker made an almost seductive pose with his hand grabbed the door entrance and his other hand on his side as he held a gun. Then his right leg crossed the other one. Rain's quick reflex was to close the door, but Joker stopped him from doing so. Joker placed his hand in front to stop the door from closing as he entered the room.

Joker shut the door behind him and aimed the gun right at Dominic. The food critic raised his arms high as he felt a wet spot appear on his pants.

" Now I want you to sit back in your chair and change your review that you gave H.Quinn's Subs." Joker stepped closer to the guy as scared Rain backed away.

" You are the real Joker," Dominic muttered as he finally managed to speak. He realized that maybe today was the last day of his life.

" In the flesh. Also, how dare you insult me. I don't think I could ever forgive you." Joker pouted.

" What do you want?" Dominic asked even though he heard the first time. His eyes never left Joker's gun.

" I already told you. I want you to go back and change your review. " Joker threatened and started to pull back the trigger.

" I can't do that. Once I publish something, I can't go back and fix it." Dominic remarked, still shaking. Joker narrowed his eyebrows and grunted.

" Well, that's a shame. I was considering letting you go, but since you don't want to cooperate-" Before Dominic could react and say anything, he felt a bullet hit. The bullet went through his skull and made a hole in his forehead. Blood flushed out as Dominic's body fell on the floor with his eyes wide opened. Blood spilled out and stained the expensive sheer carpet.

" Bullseye!" Joker cheered.


	6. The Fight

" Don't ever have friends, Frank. It's not worth it." Ivy stated. She sat on a brick of concrete where it served as a bench. Her hair was free and ragged. She wore a black jacket, a dark olive blouse, and a charcoal pencil skirt. Ivy spoke with a Venus Flytrap that she brought home.

" Having friends is so overrated. Like why do we need other people to feel happy in life? Why?" Ivy groaned in frustration.

" Shit, I don't know, Ivy. What did this, uh, what's her name again? Harley Davidson? Yeah, what did she do? That you're like all, I hate people. I wish they all died." Frank the plant moved his stems that were attached to his eyes as if they were arms.

" By the way, I always act like that," Ivy stressed.

" Then what the hell did this girl do to you?" Ivy let her body fall as she lay against Frank with her head hitting the plant's flower pot.

" It started earlier today."

***

" Should I get a cotton candy machine?" Harley had on a ruby and jet black corset with two white diamonds on each breast. The red leather pants she wore were a little tight but manageable. Then a dark red jacket covered her pale arms. Harley and Ivy strolled along the noisy street. Numerous honks, yells, and dog barks provided the city sounds. Hardly any sunlight was revealed from the thick fog.

" You're always hyper. You don't need any more sugar in your system." On top of her outfit, Ivy wore the shop's apron. An hour before, Ivy arrived at the restaurant and checked in to prepare for another long day of labor. The only thing she accomplished was unlocking the shop and dress for work. As soon as the back door opened, Harley galloped inside to snatch Ivy for a walk.

" Oh, I've. Can yuh believe dat Booster Gold asked me out?"

" What?!" Ivy came to a stop. Harley pressed lips together and nodded.

" Wow. What did you say?"

" I said sawhry, and I doan tink I'm ready tuh be in anudder relashunship. Right?" Honestly, Harley didn't express any feelings for the guy. So they continued to walk and chat.

" You know, I actually can't see you being with anyone else. I'm surprised other people want to date you." Ivy added on.

" Hey, what is dat supposed tuh mean? Are yuh tryin' tuh say I'm unlikeable, or what?" Harley frowned and halted halfway to face Ivy. Poison Ivy sighed once she saw the upsetting face Harley made.

" Uh. I mean that you. Uh, nothing. Forget what I said." Ivy shrugged. Harley pouted as the girls headed towards their destination. Neither Harley nor Ivy spoke a word to each other on the way back.

The front door creaked open as the two girls walked inside. Having his feet crossed on top of the round table and leaning back on the chair Joker's eyes were glued to the tv. He was fully dressed in his purple suit wearing a green dress shirt and lime suspenders. Joker had a black headset on and a game controller in his gloveless hands.

" Damn it! KingLongDick27 you were supposed to be on watch duty! Great now the other team is on our asses!" Joker yelled into his microphone. His eyes were narrow as he played the newest game of Cyborg Steam. Sitting at another table close to Joker was Archie who looked down, as usual, watched the boss play the newest video game.

" Man, those characters are lucky. I wish I was a character that every player's goal was to kill me." Archie let out a big deep sigh.

" Hey! Dingus! Shoot them! Why the hell are you playing if you're not going to kill the bastards!" Joker called out once more. The girls moved further into the restaurant as they were both confused about how Joker managed to set up a gaming console so quickly. Joker groaned when Ivy walked past, blocking his view for a brief second.

" What's new?" Harley pulled out a chair and sat next to Archie.

" Nothing much. The boss ordered me to help him with the gaming console and during that time your phone went off two times." Archie spoke and regained his attention to the tv. Harley raised an eyebrow as she got up and headed towards the counter. Joker moved his head in different directions while Harley walked past the screen. Once she arrived at the counter, she obtained her phone and began to look at the notifications. She raised her eyebrows, even higher, when the phone noted two missed calls. The strange thing was that Harley didn't recognize the phone number. Who on earth is this she thought. Harley logged in and marked back.

She leaned against the counter as she twisted one of her pigtails. On the third ring, the person on the other end picked up. Harley rolled her blue eyes and grunted loudly once she recognized the person's voice.

Harley attempted to keep her volume at a minimum but failed to do so. " How many fuckin' times do I have tuh tell yuh no! Okay? I don't wanna date your golden ass!" Even with his headset on, Joker furrowed his green eyebrows from Quinn's shouting. He pulled down the headset to know what the fuss was all about. " How de hell d'ja get my numbuh?! Deadshot?! He's so dead. (Harley muttered) If yuh wanna date a clown girl so bad, I can name yuh some if yuh are interested." Joker frowned as he pressed pause. The idea of Harley dating someone else didn't fit right in his stomach. Sure she was no longer with him so it would be normal if she went to see someone else.

" Good! Okay? Now, nevuh call me again. Yuh with me?" Harley hung up with anger and placed her phone back on the counter.

" So I'm guessing that was Booster Gold," Ivy remarked.

" I swear he's one of those who can't take no as an answer." Harley sighed as she stepped towards the back. She made it to the apron hanger and yanked hers off.

" But you sounded happy five minutes ago that he asked you out," Ivy called out from the counter making sure everyone heard.

" No, I didn't." Harley came back wearing her apron.

" Good," Joker said as he saved his game and turned off the television. Both Harley and Ivy with a confused expression turned to face Joker.

" I mean it's good to know that you're still doing your solo act. That you're not going to ruin it with some dork." Joker coughed. He rose from the chair and walked to the kitchen. Harley disregarded Joker's unusual behavior and moved on with her day.

***

The tune of Ding Dong by Katya played through the somewhat busy shop. Harley had been preparing a plate of French fries making sure they were just right. Ivy across from her was finishing cooking the last of the bacon. Joker was with Archie in the small closet office chatting instead of working.

The door opened to have Nick, Dim, and Wonda enter the shop, and instead of sitting at a table all three of them walked to the counter. Nick wearing a gray t-shirt, black sweatpants, and sunglasses tapped the bell on the counter. Ivy transferred the cooked bacon to a plate near the stove and took her attention to the customer.

" Yes, what would you like?" Nick brought out a yellow envelope and plopped it on the glass counter.

" Do you guys do special orders?" Nick asked. Ivy turned back to see Harley fixing up a plate of fries.

" Babe do we do special orders?" Harley finished her plate and carried it to the counter.

" What do yuh mean by special orders?" Harley glanced at her friend and the customer. Nick delivered a shy laugh and scratched his forehead.

" Oh, it's that our father told us to get lunch and he gets stubborn when he's hungry. We gave him a snickers bar but that didn't work. So what I'm saying is that we want you guys to make his favorite sandwich." Nick said and turned around to see Dim and Wonda nod. Harley picked up the yellow envelope and unfolded it. She bit her bottom lip while she examined the ingredient sheet.

" Of course!" Harley smiled. Nick, Dim, and Wonda all released a relieving sigh.

" Thank you. That will be it." Nick said as he nodded at Harley and left to an empty table having the other two follow.

Harley read the list carefully and noticed that the sandwich required two ingredients that weren't in stock. Which meant she had to go to the supplier if she wanted to get this sandwich made.

" We have a problem, Red. It says dat de sandwich will need Pepper Jack and bell peppers. Yuh with me?" Harley folded the piece of paper and placed it back into the envelope.

" So now what?" Ivy questioned even though she didn't care enough.

" Ugh, I have tuh go tuh de suppliuh and get some. Okay?" Harley groaned.

" Right now?"

"Well yeah, how else am I gonna make it," Harley proceeded to untie her apron as she walked to the hanger.

" Uh, maybe I should go," Ivy uttered as Harley came from the back.

" Why?" Harley cocked a brown eyebrow. Ivy chuckled softly with a whiff of unsureness.

" Umm. You tend to get distracted from your task." Ivy began to rub her neck. Harley's eyes opened up wide.

" What!? I do not!" Harley claimed while Ivy showed a level of uncertainty. The blonde furrowed her eyebrows. " Look if yuh want I'll have someone come wit' me." Right on cue Joker exited the closet office and walked into the kitchen/dining area. " Uh, I'll go wit' Joker. Okay." Harley grabbed Joker by his suspenders and yelped from the sudden yank. Ivy with her face of doubt crossed her arms.

" I don't think Joker is the right person to go with you," Ivy claimed. Harley frowned and pulled Joker's suspenders.

" Do yuh not trust me." Harley choked. Ivy looked up to meet Harley's eyes. " I-I trust you. Believe me. But just one thing though." Harley released her grip on Joker where the suspenders slapped him on his back. He released an exaggerated groan from the pain. " Who's going to be the waiter? I still think I'm the one who should go." Harley rubbed her lips together and thought for a minute.

" No no. Joker and I should go. Okay? If yuh left and in case de place got busy den it would be too much fawh me. If yuh and I left, I doan tink leavin' Joker in charge would be great fawh de restaurant. Yuh with me? Den Archie is busy wit' all dat paperwawhk." Harley made gestures with her hands and stuck out her tongue at the end.

" So who's going to help me then?" Ivy uncrossed her arms.

" Uh, Archie can. I know he'll be excited." Harley grinned with all her teeth showing.

" You just said he's busy." Ivy's voice started to sound annoyed.

" Doan wawhry I've. We won't take dat long. Watch we'll make it back in no time. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley's smile grew in size. Ivy knew she had to have faith in her friend but there was a little hint of doubt that told her that Harley wouldn't fully accomplish her goal. The redhead assumed it was best to ignore her doubt and to believe in her friend.

" Promise me you won't take long." Ivy worried. Harley stepped closer towards her. She slammed her palm onto the glass and said " I promise." Harley and Ivy grinned at each other before Harley pivoted back to Joker's direction.

" Okay, take off your apron, and let's go," Harley ordered and already made her way to the front door. Joker obliged and followed.

" Where are we going?" Joker questioned as he removed his uniform and dropped it at an empty table close to him.

***

Joker sat in the driver's seat and had a lit cigarette in his mouth with his window down. Harley had her hand on her cheek and leaned against the window sitting in the passenger seat. It was Harley's idea to take an automobile to their destination. Joker agreed with her plan and found a jeep parked by a clothing store when they were walking down the street. So they ran towards the car to find a pedestrian sitting in the driver's seat. Harley and Joker kindly asked to borrow it but the guy refused so they went with plan B. Which was to tie the guy up and gag him with a dirty sock they found inside and to throw him in another car's trunk. The two sat in the car listening to the radio.

 _" If all of the kings had their queens on the throne. We would pop champagne and raise a toast. To all of the queens who are fighting alone. Baby, you're not dancin' on your own_." Joker reached for the radio and turned it down a bit.

" So uh. Have you seen anyone lately?" Joker asked while one hand snatched his cigarette and tossed the ashes in the air. Harley removed her hand from her cheek and sat up straight.

" If yuh mean datin' wise den no. Why do yuh ask?" Ever since she ended her relationship with Joker, Harley never had been interested in dating let alone having a serious relationship with someone.

" Oh, nothing. I think it's because I heard you on the phone this morning." Joker added. Harley took note that there was a bit of growl and annoyance in his voice. The car fell silent until Harley spoke again.

"Have yuh seen anyone? Oh wait, I fawhgotcha had a ting wit' Punchy. Right?" Harley also noted how quickly Joker changed as soon as she said that.

" EXCUSE ME! You think I dated that bitch Trashline!" Joker felt like someone kicked him in the chest and ran him over with a city bus. Harley's eyes widened in shock.

" Yuh din't!?" Harley hundred percent thought that he had a thing with Gotham's newest villain. All the rumors sounded reasonable that she got a little hurt hearing the news.

" I can't believe you said that. Do you think I have that low of standards? I don't think I could ever forgive you for that." Joker genuinely felt hurt and offended at the same time.

" Well, I'm sawhry. I just thought dat from all de tings I heard and saw." Harley all of a sudden felt a weird sense of relief. Joker frowned and gave his attention back to the road. The car fell silent once again but only for a couple of seconds.

"Wait! Shoun't we be in costumes?" Harley asked while looking outside the window for any clothing stores. Joker placed his cigarette back into his mouth and took in a long drag where the smoke rolled out of his lips.

" Costumes? Why can't we just go like this?" He took another drag before throwing it outside the window.

" Becawze de wawhkers would only give it tuh Hailey Quinton. I changed my name so de city and de suppliuh know dat Hailey owns de place. Even though we doan act and dress differently, people eithuh tink we are de real deal or fakes. Ya' dig?" Joker didn't fully understand. Why couldn't they just go to the place the way they were dressed? Instead of making right, Joker turned left to the part of Gotham where the shopping center was located. Harley went to turn up the volume of the radio and sang along.

" _Lovin' you is like D.U.I., lovin' you is like D.U.I Lovin' you is like D.U.I., D.U.I. (oh-oh-oh-oh)."_

***

Several different customers left the shop from Ivy refusing to serve the sandwiches. One reason was that the people were being rude about how much they had to wait. So Ivy nicely told them to leave by either kissing them ( with their veins turning green) or by controlling her plants and strangling the customers. The other reason was that Ivy would not make any sandwich that involved vegetables. Where she did the same thing to those customers.

Ivy with hairs sticking out and her apron already stained was in the process of finishing two orders. After she finished, she placed them on the counter and yelled out the ingredients of both sandwiches. Since there was no waiter at the moment, Ivy decided to yell out the orders and have the citizens pick them up instead.

The door opened to show a somewhat toned guy completely covered from head to toe. His outfit was light green and his gloves and shoes were a caramel tone. The guy also wore a green head cap similar to a swim cap with a yellow clear lens covering his eyes. He marched towards the front with a smirk on his face.

" Ivy. " The guy smirked and made finger guns in Ivy's direction. Ivy sighed once she realized who the guy in front of her was.

" What do you want, Kiteman?" She glared.

" Oh you know I was in town and then I got hungry and I found this place and entered. So here we are now. Didn't know you worked here." He smiled and placed his elbows on the counter.

" Yeah, it's a long story. It was a Harley idea and well yeah." She shrugged.

" I don't see her here." Kiteman tilted his head to the side and saw the empty kitchen.

" She'll be back. She went to run errands." Kiteman swiveled back to see quite a few angry customers and saw how stressful Ivy looked with being the only one working here.

" Uh, are you alright?" He asked. Ivy was about to say she had been fine but it's been a while since Harley and Joker left and she had no idea when they were coming back.

" Come with me," Ivy demanded eagerly. Kiteman swore there was some seductiveness in her tone. She exited the kitchen and grabbed Kiteman's hand.

" Hell yeah." He muttered so only he could hear. Ivy guided him to the back hallway where the restrooms were located and let go once she found the closet. Kiteman watched Ivy open the door and watched the way her hips swayed when she stepped inside. He began to undo his strap that connected the kite on his back. Poison Ivy came out of the storage closet moments after with a spare apron in her green hands.

" Here you go-" She got caught off guard when Kiteman grasped her shoulders and pushed her to the wall. Ivy snarled and shoved him right back. " What the fuck are you doing!?"

" What do you mean? Isn't obvious when a girl seduces a guy means that sex is going to take place right after." He stated calmly.

" I need you to not touch me again and put this on." Ivy threw the apron at him and crossed her arms as she glared. Kiteman caught the apron and unfolded it to get a better view.

" Oh. So I see how there was a bit of a misunderstanding here. I swear the way you said ' come with me' sounded seductive." Kiteman laughed awkwardly and his face turned into a shade of red.

" Put it on and don't make me regret this," Ivy demanded and made her way back to the kitchen. Kiteman followed her as he did his best to fit in the apron. It was a bit tight; it was rendered to fit Ivy's figure but he made it work.

" So what am I supposed to do?" He asked.

" Your job is to be the waiter and server," Ivy replied while she undid her ponytail so she could fix it. Kiteman gave her finger guns and walked to a random table where he thought they needed help.

The karaoke machine was opened for anyone since Ivy thought it would be a good distraction. So one fellow was at the machine searching through the booklet and laughed once he found a song. The tune of the song-filled the room and Kiteman began to move his body to the beat.

" _There's some whores in this house. There's some whores in this house."_ The random guy sang.

" Yeah, sing it! Woo!" Kiteman cheered on the guy and danced his way around the shop.

" Oh, Harley please hurry," Ivy whined.

***

Deli meats inc was one of the least used suppliers for restaurants in Gotham. The company mainly dealt with restaurants that served sandwiches and deli appetizers. Of course, not every restaurant offered sandwiches on its menu and there were very few who did.

George, a short tan guy. Who was around fifty wore a shirt with the company's name with his name on the back. He had black hair and wore black jeans. George stood at the desk writing on a clipboard. The place was a small warehouse where the front entrance looked like a waiting area for a doctor's office. George didn't expect anyone today when he heard the door. He took his eyes off the clipboard to see a man and a woman enter. The man was taller than the woman and wore a gray tailor suit with a white dress shirt. He had dark brown hair fairly styled and his skin was a nice peachy color. The woman had her hair down with a dirty blonde( almost brown) look to it. Her skin also was a beautiful peach tone and she wore a blue turtleneck and black leggings. They strolled along to meet George.

" How can I help you two?" George politely asked. The pretty woman answered.

" Yes, we came here for an emergency restock." The woman smiled.

" Name?"

" Hailey Quinton." She answered.

" Ah, you're from H.Quinn's Subs right?" Both the man and woman nodded. George finished up his paperwork and motioned at them to follow him inside. The three of them walked their way to the colder area of the building. George took them to the freezer room where they kept all of the different meats and cheeses.

" So what are you here for?" He questioned as he twisted the doorknob and opened the room where cool air lured out. The brunet looked at the blonde.

" Oh, we need a-" Harley's brain froze. She forgot the list at the shop and with everything that happened so far, she couldn't remember what ingredients were needed. The girl did her best to recall her memory but failed. The only thing that filled her mind was how good Joker looked in his disguise. But she did prefer his usual appearance with his milky white skin, his beautiful emerald hair, and his purple suit. Harley winced and got back on to what she was supposed to think about.

" We need Parmesan cheese and Honey ham." Right, she hesitated. Before George could enter the room Harley interrupted him again. " Or yuh know what. I'll just go in and get de food. Ya' dig?" She didn't let George talk back and pushed him out of her way and entered the cold area. George stepped back to stand next to Joker while he stared at the door. Out of the years, George had been working at the company he had never had someone just push him away.

George, still in shock, looked up at the tall man. " She's a feisty one. Is she your wife?" Joker coughed at George's unexpected question.

" No, we just work together. We did date for a bit but something didn't work out and now we're separated." George nodded for his reaction to Joker's reply. Clearly not happy to hear the news.

" Well, that's a shame. You two look good together." George commented and stared right back at the door waiting for Harley to come out.

" Yeah, what a shame." Joker exhaled.

***

Joker and Harley retrieved the supplies needed and vacated the building. As soon as the clowns got into the car they both immediately removed their wigs and make-up. They accomplished their mission without any disasters. Joker wanted to shoot the workers there who kept eyeing him and giggling every single time he walked past them. He almost did it until Harley stopped him since she said that they didn't have time to run from the police.

Harley had her head leaning on the glass as she was deep in thought. The jeep took a couple of turns until it eventually slowed down and stopped. Joker twisted the keys where the engine died. Harley came back to reality once she felt no movement. With a puzzled facial expression, Harley shifted her focus to Joker.

" I thought that it looked nice outside with the sun hitting the right way. Even though I hate being out in the sun, still I thought walking back would be nice. Also, the cops are probably already tracking down the car." Joker chuckled and smiled at Harley.

" Yeah, dat would be nice." She grinned right back and reached for the door handle.

" _Hmm. Shouldn't you hurry back to Ivy_? It's been more than half an hour since you left. " Harley rolled her eyes rapidly once her inside voice invited herself in.

" I'm gettin' dere. Right? I bet Red has everythin' unner control. Harley murmured to herself. Ivy was fine right, she pondered.

***

" If someone else orders another Veggie sandwich I'm going to kill all of you!" Ivy yelled at the top of her lungs while pointing a metal spatula at everybody in the room. Her hair fell loose from all the stupidity that came from the customers and the insane amount of orders that piled up.

" So can I have a Veggie sandwich?" Archie completed his paperwork at the moment and currently stood next to the display counter. Ivy ignored the depressed clown's comment and went back to her work. Kiteman shuffled his way to the counter with a notepad and pen in his hand. He ripped the sheet of paper and placed it on top of the others.

" Here you go, Ivy. I'm starting to get the hang of this. I think I have this waiter gene I didn't know I had. " Ivy grunted at the pile of pending orders. Kiteman made note of Ivy's appearance and her lack of happiness he felt the desire to help her cheer up.

Surprisingly Nick, Dim, and Wonda were still seated at the table. Their original plan was to get the sandwich and flee but that plan backfired. The three of them thought of leaving without the sandwich but what are they going to tell their father of their absence. So they chose to stay and wait.

" Oh my GOD! It's been like a FUCKING hour and they're not back yet!" Ivy slammed the spatula onto the ground and picked it back up.

A loud microphone noise screeched where everyone flinched. " Okay everyone I dedicate this song to the lovely Poison Ivy." Kiteman pointed at Ivy in the kitchen who just whined. He began to move to the slow tune of the song.

" _Twenty-five years and my life is still_  
 _I'm trying to get up that great big hill of hope. For a destination." I_ vy's eyes perked up at the sound of Kiteman singing. She was in awe at how good he sounded. He didn't look like the type of person who could sing decently.

" _And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bed. Just to get it all out what's in my head. And I, I am feeling a little peculiar."_ Kiteman sang his heart and soul into the microphone not caring about the disgusted looks on the customer's faces. Ivy winced at what sounded like screeching music and long nails running down a chalkboard. She then began to take back what she speculated earlier about him singing well.

" What the hell is taking so long?" Ivy cried. She looked back at the wall phone that was next to the back door entrance and briefly had the urge to call.

***

" Batsy needs to loosen up. He's always on my ass every single time I leave Arkham. " Joker said. Both Joker and Harley laid on the grass gazing up at the sky. The clouds were big and puffy. The sky wasa mix of Cobalt and Cerulean. Beautiful. It had been rare for Gotham to have such a clear sky but whenever it did happen civilians always took a minute to appreciate it.

" Oh, he's just wawhried about what next dangerous scheme you're up tuh. Since I bet you're one of his main concoins." Harley tapped Joker's shoulder feeling the wool fabric of the gray suit. All she could see is how the sun hit Joker's profile. Enhancing his features like his elegant sharp nose and his creamy rich ruby lips. The light managed to make his skin look so soft and flawless.

" I think you're right. That's why I'm one of the best villains in Gotham. " Joker giggled to then see Harley scowling. " I said ONE of the best. "

" I know," Quinn wrinkled her nose and smirked as she gazed up at the sky.

" Ah, this is nice. I don't remember the last time we stopped and appreciated the beauty of Gotham." Joker gave the sky a small smile. They gave a moment of silence as they observed the atmosphere. Harley spread her pale arms further apart letting the breeze touch her. Her fingers moved through the grass as suddenly she felt a gloved hand on top. Harley felt a rise in warmth in her cheeks. Joker gently caressed her hand by moving in a circular motion.

Harley followed back and rubbed her thumb against the wrinkles of the leather glove. Joker completely went in and tightened his grip. Neither of them had their eyes on each other as they were holding hands. Inch by inch their bodies got closer while they held their hands a little bit tighter.

A vibration occurred. On her thigh, the phone in her pocket vibrated furiously. Harley shoved her free hand into her pocket and saw the shop's phone number across the screen. That's weird she'd never received a call from the shop, as far as she knew. She slid the green button and placed the phone to her ear.

" Yes?" She calmly answered the phone.

" HARLEY QUINN! Where the fuck are you guys!? You have been gone for over an hour!" Ivy yelled into the phone with so much anger that Harley had to remove the phone from her ear.

" We're on our way Red. It's okay we'll be dere in like five minutes."

" Hurry up! I can't do this without you." Ivy begged.

" Dat's so sweet. I'll be dere in no time." Harley ended the call.

***

" _And I sing, hey, yeah, yeah-yeah._  
 _Hey, yeah, yeah. I said, hey! What's goin' on?"_ Kiteman's ear rape of a singing voice proceeded to fill the room. Ivy groaned once she put the phone back and eagerly waited till Harley came.

***

Harley sighed and gradually broke away from Joker's grip. He released her hand while sliding across it. She sat up as she stretched her arms.

" Come on. We have tuh head back. Ya' dig?" She rose to her feet and this time she stretched her legs.

" Ugh, I don't feel like going back." Joker pouted. He didn't move one muscle or attempted to get up. So Harley took a step and playfully kicked him on his thigh.

" We need tuh go silly." Harley chuckled with a tease. Joker just laid on the grass pretending like he didn't hear her. She narrowed her eyes and kicked him again but with more force. Joker shrieked at the second kick and quickly rose to his feet.

" Alright, let's go." Harley grinned at him.

***

Several customers left the restaurant due to the lack of service. Another reason had been the ear-bleeding singing that came from the temporary waiter. Nick, Dim, and Wonda were just as impatient as Ivy. They finally gave up on waiting and decided to leave until Poison Ivy forbidden them from doing so since they were the reason why Harley and Joker left.

" Did you like my song?" Kiteman asked as he finished wrapping everything and strolled to the counter.

" It was beautiful." Even though her tone had been sarcastic there was a gleam in his eyes.

" So I was thinking do you want to-" the sound of the door slam interrupted Kiteman's train of thought.

" I'm here Red!" Harley shouted and rushed inside. She held a plastic bag in her hands and was dressed back to normal.

" Finally," Ivy mumbled. Harley made it to the counter and dropped the bag on top. Ivy yanked the bag towards her and began to untie the knot. Once she untied it she froze as she couldn't take her eyes off the ingredients. Harley frowned that Ivy didn't say anything. She saw the instant change in her facial expression.

Ivy tore the plastic bag into tiny pieces and took out the food. She spread them out on the counter.

" What do you see?" Ivy's voice grew cold.

" I just see Parmesan cheese and a pack of Honey ham," Harley replied with confusion. Ivy sighed and left when she came back there was the yellow envelope in her hands. She pulled out the sheet and shoved it towards Harley.

" Read it." Harley grabbed the sheet of paper from her friend and unfolded it. She read the list as her eyes increased in size.

" Oops." Harley chuckled shyly. Ivy tightened her fists and marched out into the seating area.

" You were gone for like two goddamn hours and you didn't even bring the right things! Do you have any idea of what I had to go through!?"

***

When Harley arrived, Kiteman moved back to the karaoke machine ready to choose a song, but the connection malfunctioned. The screen turned into a dark blue with a big error box. He narrowed his eyes and reached for the side buttons of the tv. So he pressed the buttons at random hoping for something to work.

***

"I'm sawhry. I guess I fawhgot tuh brin' de list wit' me. Yuh got me so fahr?" Harley answered softly as she smiled awkwardly.

" I thought the whole reason that clown went with you was so you guys could get here quicker." Ivy crossed her arms.

" We did our best, I've. But I guess we got a bit-" Harley winced.

" A bit, what?" Ivy scowled at her.

" A bit distracted." Harley cringed. Ivy spoke no words as she stared at the jester.

" I knew I should have gone." Ivy took her focus off Harley and sighed in disappointment.

"Quit makin' me feel bad!" Harley called out and punched her thigh.

" Well, you should have just done what you're supposed to do!" Ivy faced the floor. " I swear sometimes I think I'm talking to a child." She ran her palm over her forehead.

" Are yuh callin' me immature, or what? How dare yuh!" Harley felt the nerves on her forehead expand.

***

Kiteman pressed the buttons repeatedly until something popped up on the screen. He gasped and continued to press them. The screen turned pitch black until it divided into squares each of them showing a different part of the restaurant.

" How the hell did I get to the security cameras?" He proceeded to press the buttons until the screen showed the kitchen camera having Harley and Joker both intoxicated.

***

Ivy shifted her view around the shop. Noticing all of the customers paused their eating time and chose to observe Harley and Ivy's little argument. It's like when the two most popular girls get heated in the school's cafeteria. The redhead reached Kiteman's corner with the flat screen. She saw him scratching his green head cap. Her eyes were overcome with rage and her teeth grinding.

Harley cocked an eyebrow at Ivy's drastic transition when her green eyes faced the screen.

" I thought you said you were over him." Harley confused, rotated her head to the tv. Her shiny red lips parted as the beat of her heart pounded. On the screen, it projected Harley kissing her ex clown boyfriend.

" Ah, dat's not me. " Ivy narrowed her eyes.

" I can not believe you. After everything and since happens." Ivy motioned to the tv where Harley went on her knees and ran her fingers down Joker's legs. " I trusted you that you wouldn't make mistakes like this."

Harley bit her bottom lip. Her face temperature rose." Yuh-you're just like Harleen. I'm tired of hearin' dis shit! It's drivin' me crazy!"

" I'm just trying to help you because I care." Ivy brought her volume down a notch. She worried if Harley got back together with Joker that her friend would get hurt again.

" I doan need your help. Okay? I'm doin' perfectly fine. I doan get why you're helpin' if I'm not in love wit' him." Harley stressed. Ivy didn't mumble another word.

" Quit denying it!"

" I'm not! Okay? I-I doan need yuh! Are yuh tryin' tuh irritate me fawh fun since yuh have no friends besides me!" Harley blurted out. Ivy eyed Harley's fury. The blonde's eyes transition into a lighter blue almost clear. The redhead felt the inside of her chest sink. Why is she feeling like this? This is why Ivy always stuck with her plants. No complications and more importantly no fights. In silence, Ivy walked past Harley as she untied her apron. She arrived at the door and stripped off her uniform. The apron hit the tile floor. All of the remaining customers watched intensely and let out gasps.

" I can't deal with this. I quit." Ivy claimed without meeting Harley's eyes. Harley couldn't think of anything else to say back.

Ivy pushed the door slightly open before she turned around. " Ah, Let's go Kiteman. The clown's back so your services are no longer available." Kiteman was still at the tv trying to figure out the problem but decided to leave it. He compelled and took off the apron before he wrapped it around his arm. Harley glanced at him and walked away. She felt like she could scream and slap herself in the face. But she didn't do anything. Anything. Kiteman met with Ivy at the door and was about to leave.

" Wait, Kiteman stay," Harley spoke. He faced Harley and Ivy. Ivy frowned at both of them. Kiteman stood there not knowing what to do or say.

" Uh. I have plans. I just did this for an emergency and-" The guy wasn't sure what he was saying as he began to feel uncomfortable.

" Fine just go." Ivy and Kiteman vanished from the scene only leaving Harley speechless in the middle of the shop. The customers tried their best not to stare as they went back to eating as if nothing happened.

" Archie. I thought I told yuh tuh delete it." Harley's voice was calm with no real scold to it.

" I deleted the one on the computer. I think you have to physically break the camera to erase the footage." Archie replied where he was leaning against the wall. Harley dropped her head down so can see her feet while slouched. She dropped her forehead on the counter and sighed.

***

" And here we are now."

" Couldn't you just have skipped right to the point?" Frank the plant said. Ivy turned onto her side.

" If I did then you'll have no context," Ivy mentioned.

" So do you think she's going to come here?" Frank tilted down to see Ivy running her finger through the cement.

" Oh, I bet she will."


End file.
